


When your world is upside down

by resonance_and_d



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Superheroes/Superpowers, Asexual Character, Friendship, Gay Character, M/M, Memory Alteration, Memory Loss, Metaphysics, Possession, Superpowers, slightly unreliable narrator due to memory alteration
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-13
Updated: 2016-03-23
Packaged: 2018-02-25 05:25:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 29,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2610092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/resonance_and_d/pseuds/resonance_and_d
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sora isn't a bad guy, no matter how things might look.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Something wrong

**Author's Note:**

> This is sort of an experimental fic. I am writing the sequel to a fic I never wrote in the first place. I may write some short oneshots later to flesh out the back story, but I think this stands on its own for now.

There was a knock on the door right after Sora got home from school. Sora opened it to find Riku standing there. His hair was dripping wet from the rain outside, and his clothes were sticking to him, and the overall effect was that he looked kind of miserable. Then again, Riku always looked like that, these days. Some lingering effect of being "tainted" with Ansem's soul, or maybe just because he felt bad about the things he'd done while he was possessed. In any case, he hardly ever looked happy anymore.

"I know who the last member of Organization 13 is," Riku said, staring at Sora far too morosely for someone who had good news. "I think I've known for a long time. I just didn't want to be right." He didn't move to come in. He just stood there, barely sheltered by the roof's overhang.

"Well?" Sora asked. "Who is it? Don't look so worried- it can't be that bad. We've taken down Ansem already- there can't be anyone more powerful than him in their ranks, right? I mean, he had that whole soul thing going on.”

He expected Riku to cheer up. It didn’t work, probably because  _Riku_ now had the soul thing going on, having absorbed Ansem's powers during the whole possession event last year.

"It's you," Riku said flatly. "You're the last member of Organization 13."

Sora laughed. "Good one, Riku."

Riku's face remained sad, and a little angry. Sora's laughter died. "Wait- you're serious? Riku, I'd never join Organization 13. I'm one of the good guys, remember? I wouldn't be a _supervillain_."

Riku said, "Tell me, Sora, what were you doing at nine last night?"

"Doing homework," Sora answered, genuinely puzzled.

"Funny. I called your house around then, and your mom picked up. She said you'd stepped out."

Sora frowned. "What?"

"You know, I didn't see you turn in any homework today, either."

Sora opened his mouth. He closed it.

He felt like the facts were escaping him. Because yeah, he remembered doing homework last night, for hours. But he also knew that Riku was right- he hadn't had anything to turn in today. And he didn't know how both of those things could be true at the same time. Even Sora wasn't _that_ bad at homework.

"I don't understand," Sora said.

"I saw you," Riku snapped. "Your mask slipped. I saw your face, Sora. Stop playing dumb.”

Sora just shook his head, feeling like the world was slipping out from under him. He'd been doing homework. He wasn't a supervillain. He was a _hero_. He hadn't been out last night. He'd been safe in his room, trying to pull his grades up enough that he didn't have to repeat this year (again).

"I think that there's something wrong with me," Sora said, feeling suddenly dizzy. "Riku-"

And then there was a feeling like someone pulling him backwards, and his own voice said, "Dammit, you had to let him know something was wrong, didn't you?"

And then there was a bright light, and Sora's last thought before he whited out was that this was way more familiar than it should be.

Then he was gone.


	2. The Basement

Sora woke up handcuffed, in total darkness, bruised and aching.

"Huh?" he tried to say, but it came out as more of a pained moan.

It took him a couple minutes to get his bearings. It was damp where he was, and once his eyes were adjusted he could see that there was a faint patch of light over there, probably coming from under a door over there, and it was also illuminating a box over there. Then he recognized where he was; it was Riku's basement. They'd played down here often enough when they were kids that Sora knew it well, though apparently not well enough to recognize it in total darkness.

It took a moment longer to remember the last thing that had happened. His voice saying things all on its own. Memories suddenly floating to the surface, Riku saying he was the last member of Organization 13-

It didn't make any sense.

"Riku?" he said.

But only silence answered him.

"He won't come," his own voice said, after a moment.

Sora just about jumped out of his skin.

"I tried pretending to be you," the other continued casually. "It worked for a little while. But now he won't come down except to bring us meals."

Sora tested the handcuffs nervously, and found that his left arm was securely cuffed to a pole. Good. Whatever was hiding inside of him, he didn't want it to be able to hurt anyone.

"Who are you?" Sora asked. "Why are you possessing me? What do you want?"

Again, silence, and Sora thought that he wasn't going to get an answer. But then, slowly, the other said, "My name is Roxas. I want to know why I'm here, too. And I'm not possessing you. At least, if I am, it isn’t on purpose."

"Then what are you doing in my brain?"

His head shook, all on its own. "I don't know, but I'm going to find out."

That was all the talking that Roxas seemed to want to do. Sora spent the next hour wondering exactly how long Roxas had been possessing him, how long he'd been part of Organization 13 without knowing it, if Roxas had hurt anyone using Sora's body.

This was really bad.

It was in the middle of all those thoughts that Riku came down the stairs and turned on the light. He was carrying a tray of food.

"Riku!" Sora said.

Riku's expression was hard, and Sora remembered that Roxas had said that he’d been pretending to be Sora, before. Riku couldn't know that Sora was really himself now.

And Roxas could still be listening.

"Don't tell me anything important," Sora said in a rush. "I don't know if he can hear."

Riku's expression softened, but only by a hair. He set the food next to Sora carefully.

"How long have I been here?" Sora asked. "What happened?"

"We fought," Riku said. "I won, and dragged you down here. You've been here two days."

"Are you hurt at all?" Sora asked. "I'm sorry, Riku, if I'd known something was this wrong, I would have- I don't know, handcuffed myself, probably."

"It's not your fault," Riku said, expression still stony. And Sora thought, how good had Roxas been at impersonating him, that Riku still wasn't sure?

"Do you have a plan?" Sora asked. "Don't tell me what it is, if you do. But- do you have one?"

"I do," Riku said. He stood there awkwardly for a moment, obviously unsure how much more to say. "Don't worry, Sora. If that's you. I'm going to get that thing out of you. You won't be trapped much longer."

Sora nodded. His stomach rumbled, and he grabbed a slice of bread from the tray Riku had brought down. It was toasted, with more butter than was really healthy, just like Sora liked it.

"Thank you," he said.

The soup that came with the bread was lukewarm, and Sora was glad- it meant that Roxas couldn't throw it in Riku's face. Couldn't hurt Riku- any more than he already had, anyway, just by being there, and lying, and pretending to be Sora.

Sora didn't like it when people hurt his friends.

"His name is Roxas," Sora said. "The thing possessing me. We had- a little bit of a conversation, earlier. I don't know if he told you anything."

"He claims he isn't possessing you at all," Riku said.

"Yeah," Sora said. "He told me that, too. That it wasn’t on purpose. I don't know what he meant by it, though. He didn't explain any more than that."

He took a long sip of soup. He was hungry. Whatever had happened in the past few days, apparently eating hadn't been a big factor.

"I'm going to figure this out," Riku told him. "We're going to free you, Sora."

He gathered up Sora's empty dishes. With one fleeting glance back, he returned upstairs.

This time he left the dim light bulb in the corner on. It didn’t do much besides make shadows, but at least Sora wasn’t totally in the dark now.

* * *

The first day was the worst. Riku came down three times more to let Sora eat and to use the bathroom in the corner of the basement. Once, Roxas tried to make a break for it. Riku tackled him to the ground, managed to handcuff the two of them together while Roxas fought every motion, scratching and punching with his free hand and biting when that failed.

Sora's body wasn't all that strong unless he was borrowing someone else's superstrength. Apparently Roxas didn't know how to do that, or maybe he couldn't use Sora's powers at all, but in any case, he was stuck with Sora's base strength, and Sora was a good five inches shorter than Riku.

Sora never thought he'd be glad to be so much weaker than Riku. But as Riku dragged him back to the basement, Sora couldn't help but be grateful.

After that, Riku kept Sora handcuffed to either him or the pole in the basement at all times, even when Sora was himself.

Not that Sora always was himself, when he claimed to be. Roxas hadn't given up on pretending. He tried to wheedle information out of Riku, to figure out his plans for getting rid of Roxas, to find out the movements of other superheroes and villains. Riku always figured it out before Roxas got anything important, and then Sora would be himself again. Sometimes he whited out during those moments. Sometimes, horribly, he was trapped in his own mind, able to feel and see everything Roxas felt and saw, but unable to do anything about it. More and more, it was the latter.

"I'm sorry," Sora would say, when he was himself again. "I can't seem to stop him- I wish I could, but I can't seem to fight him off."

"It's okay," Riku would say. And then he would put the key to the cuffs carefully out of reach, and come over to Sora to hold his hand awkwardly. "We'll fix this, I promise."

After the first day, it was a little better. Riku brought Sora his textbooks, and told him what the homework was for the day. His homework was too hard without someone to explain it to him, and it was boring to boot, but it was better than sitting in the dark with no one but Roxas to keep him company.

He wondered what Riku did with the homework, when Sora had completed it. Did he turn it in? What had he told the teachers about Sora's absence? What had he told Sora's mom? Sora had never told her he was a super, let alone a meta. Sora wanted to ask those questions, but he wasn't sure he'd like the answers, so he didn't.

On the third day, Kairi came to see him.

"Oh, Sora," she said. She looked at Riku. "He is Sora right now, right?"

Riku shrugged. "Talk to him. It's the only way to tell. But be careful. He's not safe, even when he's Sora. Roxas can take over at any moment."

Kairi stood a few steps away. "Sora?"

"Hi, Kairi," Sora said, smiling weakly.

She took a few steps closer, staying just out of reach.

"You shouldn't have come," Roxas said, and Sora was at the back of his mind again, unable to do anything but watch. "I'm dangerous right now."

"Don't be silly," Kairi said. "I couldn't just leave you down here alone, could I?"

Sora tried desperately to take control, to shout that Roxas was up to something. But as usual, he was powerless to do anything.

"Thank you," Roxas said, and Sora couldn't believe that they were falling for this. Didn't Roxas' smile look as fake as it felt on Sora's mouth?

Kairi took a step closer. Riku did nothing to stop her, and Sora struggled even harder to keep Roxas from doing something evil. If he could do so much as twitch weirdly, they might suspect something was wrong.

Nothing.

Kairi closed the distance between them, grabbed Sora, and hugged him tightly. Roxas held her in return with his free arm. But when she tried to pull away, Roxas grabbed her free hand, pulled her closer, and held her arm, all pretense of smiling gone.

What was he planning on doing? He only had one free hand. What on Earth could he do to Kairi like that? It didn't make sense.

Then his hand started to glow.

"The hell?" Riku said, taking a step closer.

"You're going to unlock the handcuffs now," Roxas said. "Or I leave a nasty scar on Kairi's arm. I may not be able to use my powers much in this godforsaken basement, but I can make her hurt."

His hand glowed brighter. Kairi shrieked.

"Fine!" Riku said. "You win! Let Kairi go!"

"Not until I'm free," Roxas said. But his hand dimmed, and Sora's heart stopped beating so fast.

Riku undid the handcuffs while Roxas kept a tight hold on Kairi's wrist. She tried to struggle away a couple of times, but when she did, Roxas increased the intensity of the glowing, making her wince and stop. Sora couldn't feel any heat or anything, but probably that was because his body was being used as the conduit for Roxas' power- whatever it was.

"Now back off," Roxas told Riku. "Into the corner, but stay where I can see you."

Riku backed up, eyes never leaving Roxas.

"I'll let go of her when I'm far enough away," Roxas told Riku, and Sora noticed that as he talked, his grip loosened slightly.

It was a stupid way to hold someone, anyway. If Roxas' attention slipped for more than a minute-

-and yeah, Kairi had noticed, too. She twisted her arm, hissing as Roxas' hand glowed brighter, and then she was free.

Internally, Sora cheered. Kairi might not have superpowers, but she wasn't helpless.

_Take that_ , Sora thought, in Roxas' general direction.

Roxas, who had been making to grab Kairi again, froze.

"What?" he said.

And then Riku was in Sora's face, and slammed Roxas against the wall with superhuman strength.

It hurt. And Sora thought that wasn't really fair, when it was Roxas who'd been threatening people. But it was necessary, and even through the pain, Sora was glad Roxas was getting his comeuppance for threatening to hurt Kairi.

Roxas didn't take long to recover. He fell into a roll, and made his way to a dusty patch of sunlight falling from the dirty window. Then he grinned a grin that felt evil and wrong on Sora's face.

Riku tackled him again, pinning one of his arms to the ground and reaching for the other. But Roxas squirmed, and Riku couldn't quite get hold of his other arm. Roxas made a scooping motion with his free hand, and that was weird, like he was trying to catch dust particles from the beam of sunlight, only why would he bother to do that in the middle of a fight? And then he pressed his hand gently to Riku's face, and shut his own eyes tightly-

The flash of light was enough that it was bright even through Sora's closed eyelids. Riku was stunned, and his grip on Roxas' other arm loosened. Roxas was able to kick his way out from under Riku, and he stood, took one step towards the stairs-

Pain blossomed in Sora's head, and the last thing he saw as he crumpled backwards to the ground was Kairi, looking grim and standing over him with a section of pipe.

* * *

He woke up what was probably a few minutes later, cuffed to the pole once more. Riku was sitting on the stairs, rubbing at his eyes. Kairi had found some boards and was nailing them over the window by the stairs.

Sora wasn't just going to be locked up here for the foreseeable future. He was going to be locked up here in total darkness.

Panic rushed through his body. His chest felt tight. There wasn't enough air, suddenly. And then he moaned, but it wasn't him. It was Roxas. Roxas was the one panicking. Roxas was panicking, _and Sora could feel it_.

He'd thought this whole possession thing couldn't get any worse. He'd been wrong.

"Are you okay?" Kairi asked, turning around when she heard Sora stir. "I'm sorry for hitting so hard. I suppose I was a bit angry."

"Don't leave me in the dark," Roxas said. "Please- I'm sorry I threatened you, but I wouldn't really have done any harm to you- I don't do stuff like that, I'm a spy, not a torturer or assassin or anything- please-"

Sora didn't know how much of that was true. But he did know that his heart was racing, and he was breathing hard, and that told him that Roxas' panic wasn't fake.

"Please," Roxas repeated.

Riku, still rubbing at his eyes, did not look impressed. Kairi turned to him and said, "He's afraid. Riku- is this really right? Treating him this way?"

"He's the one possessing Sora," Riku said harshly. "If he'd just let him go, none of this would be necessary."

"I don't know how," Roxas said. "I don't have a clue, I just woke up in this body, I don't know how I got here. Please don't keep me in the dark. Exorcise me or do whatever you have to, but not that."

"Isn't exorcism for ghosts?" Kairi asked. "Are you a ghost, Roxas?"

"No such thing," said Riku, finally standing up. "People are bad enough. I would know. There's no need to make up worse things to worry about."

Kairi turned back to Roxas. "Do you know what you are?"

Roxas was calming down a little now that the immediate threat of the windows being boarded up had passed.

"I'm a _person_. Just- one that happens to be inside your friend, unfortunately. And anything beyond that- how would I know? It's not like I woke up with an instruction manual."

Riku scoffed, and walked up the stairs.

"Wait, Riku," Kairi said. Then, with an apologetic look at Roxas, she followed.

The window was still half-unboarded. But from the sliver of sky Sora could see, he could tell it would get dark out soon. He watched the light fade over the next hour or so, until the only light in the basement was the line of it at the bottom of the door that lead upstairs- the one that led to the kitchen.

That kitchen might as well be the moon, for all the good it did Sora. His whole world had been narrowed to a point. The furthest he ever made it was the bathroom in the corner of the basement.

"Distract me," Roxas said. It was only then that Sora noticed his hands were clenched into fists, his nails digging into his palms. He wasn't quite panicking- not yet- but he was definitely on edge.

"Why should I do you any favors?" Sora asked. "As far as I can tell, you've done nothing but cause me problems."

"You're nice," Roxas said, shifting a little where he sat. "Too nice. You don't want me to be miserable."

Sora sighed. It was true. Even though Roxas had taken over his body and utterly ruined his life, Sora didn't hate him. Because Roxas was a person, and Sora had never been able to hate anyone, and Roxas didn't even seem to want to be in Sora's body, and he hadn't been planning on really hurting Kairi (said he hadn't really been planning on hurting Kairi, Sora remembered- that was hardly a guarantee even if it felt true), and he was alone and afraid here even if he didn't want to show it.

Plus, Roxas being miserable was pretty uncomfortable for Sora, too.

"Fine," Sora said. "I'll distract you. Er- I guess you already know all about me, so no surprises there."

He had to pause then to let Roxas give a little scoff.

"Well, you _do_ ," Sora said. "You've been spying on me for who knows how long."

"Since I woke up," Roxas said evasively.

"Right. And all I know about you is that you're working for Organization 13, and that you're terrified of the dark."

"I wouldn't say terrified," Roxas protested.

Sora was pointedly silent.

"I was fine with it at first," Roxas said. "Until I discovered my powers."

"What happened?"

Roxas paused, as though unsure whether he should continue.

He didn't trust Sora. The feeling was mutual.

Roxas shrugged. "I can protect myself at night," he said. "Sort of. If I get enough sun during the day. But I'm still not as strong in the dark as in the light. There have been some close calls. I have a reason to be afraid of the dark."

He rattled the handcuffs irritably. "And if I had direct sunlight to power me, I would be able to get rid of these damn handcuffs. I would cut my way right through them like they were butter."

Sora could probably super-strength his way out of the handcuffs without much problem, though it would hurt like heck. He didn't mention this to Roxas, in case it gave him ideas about trying to use Sora's powers. Roxas hadn't shown any ability to do that, yet- but Sora wasn't going to take chances.

"I hate this," Roxas said. "I hate being trapped. I hate being alone. I hate the darkness."

Then he went quiet except for the ragged sound of his breathing.

"Why are you even part of the Organization?" Sora asked. "If you switched sides, you could be free. We could find a way to get you out of my head safely. And you wouldn't have to watch yourself so carefully. Riku and Kairi would protect you when it was dark out- so would I- and-

His mouth snapped shut. Roxas had apparently decided to silence him. "No. Just- no. I have my reasons for being a part of the Organization. Don't try to change my mind."

Since this was obviously a touchy subject, Sora decided to switch topics and come back to it later. He wasn't going to give up, though. He had to make Roxas at least consider not being a supervillain. It would make life so much easier.

"So- do you have any hobbies?" Sora asked, in a less-than-elegant change of topics.

"No," Roxas said. "When would I have time, between the Organization and pretending to be you?"

"Oh. Um. So- _evildoing_ is your hobby, then, I guess."

Roxas sighed. "I am not an ‘evildoer’," he said. "The Organization does a lot of morally gray stuff, I'll admit. But it also does a lot of good. We're cleaning up the streets of Destiny Islands. Do you know how many supervillains we've eliminated? You need to realize that there's a lot of moral complexity out there."

"You know who likes to talk about moral complexity?" Sora said. "Evil people, that's who."

"You're a huge idiot," Roxas said.

"I was kidding," Sora said. "Mostly. I mean, I pretty much have to be against the Organization. They kidnapped Kairi and tried to kill me. Your old leader took over Riku’s body and soul and nearly erased him. They're still up to something and I don't know what."

To that, Roxas had no response. Sora should have known better than to expect one, from the person possessing him.

Eventually Sora fell asleep. He woke up aching. The floor of the basement was cold and uncomfortable, and the handcuffs keeping his left arm anchored to the pole were hardly helping.

He sat up, and rubbed his hands together to warm them up.

Sora realized that he had no idea what day it was. The disorientation was... well, not as bad as he'd expected. His head felt so much clearer than it had in a long time. Probably because his memories hadn't been tampered with in a while. It was like he'd been looking at everything through a haze that had finally lifted.

It was a sobering realization, that he felt more like himself than he could remember feeling in- god, in months.

He shivered a little, the cold of the basement getting to him. He'd have to ask Riku for a blanket when he came down with breakfast.

He waited quietly, knees drawn up toward himself. It was still dark out- it would be at least another hour before Riku came.

Was Roxas awake? Usually he didn't let Sora have this much control unless he was planning something. Maybe he just didn't want to deal with the cold and the dark. Sora didn't want to deal with it either, but he didn't have a choice in the matter.

Being awake for this possession was way worse than sleeping through it. He just had to hope that eventually he worked out a way to fight through it.

After a while, the silence got to Sora, too. He’d always hated being alone.

"Roxas?" he said, hating himself a little. Roxas was the enemy. He wasn't supposed to be company for Sora. Sora wanted him gone. But- Sora had always hated being alone. Even the company of an evil member of the Organization was preferable to no company at all. Even if it did mean that Sora lost part of his control over his body. He was getting used to that, anyway.

It took a while for Roxas to respond. When he did, he yawned. So- maybe he had been sleeping. Or maybe he wanted Sora to _think_ he had been.

Sora hated mind games. But sometimes they were inevitable. He decided to say nothing. All he'd get were lies if he asked.

"What?" Roxas asked. He sounded... surprised.

"I didn't want to be alone," Sora said. "I don't like you. I don't think we could like each other. But- I don't want to be in this basement alone."

"Now who's scared of the dark?" Roxas said.

"It's not that," Sora said. "It's just- you're not the only one who's cut off from the source of your power, you know."

"What?"

"My friends are my power," Sora said, after a long moment deciding how much to say. "You must know that. You spied on me for long enough. And now they don't trust me. They can't- you made sure of that. And now I'm all alone."

"Poor you," Roxas said, but he didn't sound as unsympathetic as he sounded like he was trying to be. Then, more seriously, he added, "No one has ever trusted me. In the Organization. Even my best friend seems to worry that I'm going to turn traitor. Because of you. I could never be trusted, in case I lost control of you."

Sora felt the absurd urge to apologize. He resisted it.

"Not my fault," he said, a little stiffly. "And for the record? I'm not too pleased with being controlled."

There was a long silence.

"I can't say I'm sorry," Roxas said. "I'm doing what I have to, to survive. You'd do the same if you had to."

"I wouldn't possess anyone to start with," Sora said. "So it's stupid to argue about it."

More silence. Sora imagined Roxas was just barely restraining himself from shouting "I'm not trying to possess you!" Roxas seemed kind of hung up on that point.

Come to think of it, how was Roxas possessing him in the first place? If his powers were light-related, and not soul-related, how had he managed it?

Maybe someone else had put Roxas in Sora's body. Ansem, maybe. He'd shattered Sora's soul once- maybe he'd decided to put another one in there while Sora was sleeping, before he'd recovered.

If so, Roxas would have been with Sora for nearly a year.

How much time was Sora missing? He didn't know. Roxas had done something to Sora's memories, making it so Sora hadn't noticed the missing time. Not until Riku had confronted him about it, and even then, all Sora had were fragments of that one night. It wasn't much to go on.

"When did you wake up?" Sora asked Roxas, figuring maybe he could be useful in answering some basic questions. "You messed with my head so much that I can't figure it out."

Roxas was silent Maybe he didn't feel like being helpful. But then, slowly, he said, "I guess the first time was when you were in the hospital, after Ansem tried to shatter your soul. But it's hard to say. It didn't happen all at once."

That matched up with his theory, then. But it didn’t make much sense anyway. Why put another soul in Sora? Ansen had thought Sora was useless. He hadn't even known that Sora had powers, let alone what they were. How useful they were.

No. Ansem hadn't done this.

Sora didn't know how Roxas was messing with his memories, either. That seemed like a whole other power. Usually they came one to a person, and the chances that Roxas was a meta like Sora, able to use others’ powers, were really slim-

He was interrupted from this train of thought when Riku opened the door and came down the stairs.

"You two were talking," Riku said. "I could hear you from the kitchen," he added.

"Like old friends," Roxas said, with a grin. Or, he showed Sora's teeth, anyway.

Riku didn't look visibly disturbed. Maybe it was easier for him, when Roxas was mean. At least he had to know it wasn't Sora.

"Kairi'll be down in a minute with food," Riku said. "I just wanted to check on something, first. I have a theory." He leaned in towards Sora, and pressed one hand against Sora's chest.

"What are you checking?" Sora blurted out before he realized that he had control of his body again.

Riku was engrossed in his powers, though, and didn't respond.

The door to the upstairs opened, letting in a bit of light. Sora looked up at it, expecting to see Kairi with lunch. Instead, though, a man with firetruck-red hair walked quietly down the stairs. Sora opened his mouth to say something, and Roxas snapped it shut. The man grinned at him, a big wide grin that looked sort of familiar.

Then Sora placed him. He looked different in street clothes than he did in the Organization's coat, but that grin- it was unmistakable. Axel. That was his name. Power over fire- not the strongest member of the Organization, but not a pushover, either. Sora would have had scars from the last time they fought, except that Riku’s powers meant that Sora would never scar again.

Riku's brow furrowed, and Roxas returned his gaze to Riku, carefully avoiding looking at Axel.

For what felt like the millionth time, Sora tried to fight off Roxas' control. For what felt like the millionth time, he failed. If he could just warn Riku, could do anything-

But he couldn't.

Out of the corner of his eye, Sora could see Axel lean over, pick something up. Oh god, he had that pipe- the one Kairi had nearly given Sora and Roxas a concussion with earlier. He walked the remaining three steps to where Riku was hunched over, raised the pipe, and -

Riku's hand whipped up quicker than Sora could make out, and stopped the descending pipe as if it were made of paper- even crumpling it a bit.

"I'm not stupid," Riku said, turning around. "I knew that wasn't Kairi coming down those stairs. You walk heavier than her."

Axel just grinned. "This is more fun, anyway," he said. "I've been thinking for days what I would do to you when I found you."

Sora's heart was beating fast, and he felt like something had settled on his chest. Roxas was panicking again. Why? This was a rescue attempt, wasn't it? Shouldn't Roxas be happy?

But there was no time to think about that. Suddenly all the cardboard boxes and junk in the basement burst into flames. Roxas squinted against the sudden bright light, and then grinned. He was still panicked, still had that horrible weight on his chest- but the weight seemed to weigh less now.

Roxas breathed in. Sora wasn't sure, but it seemed like the flames got less intense when he did. Or, at least- dimmer. Then he breathed out, and they returned to normal.

Then Roxas grabbed the chain of the handcuffs, and at the touch of his hands the metal melted away, suddenly red hot. But it didn't hurt when the hot metal dripped onto Sora's arm. Huh. Heat apparently didn't hurt Roxas. Sora didn't see how that had anything to do with light. Powers were sometimes weird, though.

Riku was still turned towards Axel. Roxas stood, and punched him. It didn't seem to do much, besides hurt Sora's hand. He wasn’t even making a fist right- if he’d had any power behind it, he would have broken his thumb. But despite how much the punch sucked, it got Riku's attention away from Axel.

Riku had already shown that he could beat Roxas in a fight. What the heck was the point of that move? Did Roxas think that he could beat Riku now? Why? Sure, Roxas had access to his powers better, surrounded by all this bright fire- but he'd been at full strength when Riku had first captured him, and he hadn’t won then.

Riku could take both Roxas and Axel. Sora was sure of it. And while he wasn't exactly looking forward to getting beaten up, it was better than Roxas getting free.

"Sora," Riku said. "I'm sorry." Then he took a swing at Sora. At Roxas.

Roxas rolled out of the way. He closed his eyes, shoved his hand at Riku, doing the same trick he'd done the last time they fought- but Riku was wise to his game, and shoved Roxas clear across the basement before he had a chance to let out a burst of light in Riku's face.

Roxas slumped against the wall, the breath knocked out of him by the impact. He watched, still utterly panicked.

Axel and Riku fought. Riku kept making to grab Axel, but Axel would then let off a burst of flame that would force Riku to let go. It was a weird fight. Riku would have the upper hand, if Axel would just stop moving. Sora couldn't remember Axel ever moving that quickly when they'd fought before, and Sora had fought him several times.

But then- if Axel knew that Roxas was the Organization's spy, he might have gone easy on Sora. After all, it wasn't like Sora was going to kill Axel- Sora was one of the good guys. They didn't do things like that. And a dead spy was no good to anyone...

Sora hated this. How much of his life was a lie? Presumably everything before a year or so ago was fine- because Sora hadn’t even known the Organization existed back then- but anything after that had to be suspect. He’d been a double agent and he hadn’t even known it.

Riku failed to dodge one of Axel's bursts of flame. His right arm was badly burnt. Sora couldn't see how badly from all the way across the basement. Roxas, still recovering from his impact with the wall, took a shaky breath, and coughed against the smoke. Sora's vision swam a little, and he realized that it wasn't just the breath that had been knocked out of him- he'd hit his head, too. Everything had hurt so much that it hadn't stood out against the general pain until now.

His eyes closed. Sora raged. He needed to see this. Needed to see if Riku was okay.

Roxas slumped over. The sound of battle stopped. The heat from the flames vanished.

And the last thing Sora heard, before he finally succumbed to unconsciousness, was a voice saying, "It's alright. Don't worry. You're safe now, Roxas."


	3. The Kill

Sora woke in pain. He tried to move, and found that he couldn't. Right. Roxas must be awake too, then. Sora wasn't in charge.

Sora tried to remember the last thing that had happened, and found that he couldn't. There had been a fight. He remembered Axel and Riku battling. But what had happened after that?

With a pained hiss, Roxas finally opened his eyes.

It was bright. That was the only impression Sora got, for the first few seconds. Bright like he hadn't seen in days. Gosh, maybe as much as a week. He'd lost count of how long it had been, stuck in that basement.

Then Roxas blinked a couple times, and his eyes adjusted.

He was in a room that was all windows. Some sort of sun room, Sora supposed. Light streamed in from every direction, and even weak late-fall sunshine seemed really bright right now.

"Axel?" Roxas croaked. And Sora remembered smoke, and how it had burned his lungs. Right. There had been fire. There had been Axel.

Everything hurt, but out of all the pain, his head hurt most. Sora couldn't remember hurting it. Had Roxas been messing with his memories again?

No, wait. Sora knew this. Head injuries sometimes came prepackaged with their own memory-messing-up...ness. And from that mental sentence, he knew that he wasn't thinking super clearly, either.

Hopefully Roxas was feeling that, too, Sora thought bitterly. Since it was probably all his fault.

"Axel?" Roxas called out, again, a little louder. "Are you here?"

Sora was under covers. He was really warm, and he kind of wanted to go back to bed.

Roxas sat up, and even though it wasn't very fast, it made Sora dizzy. There was a jingling noise, and Roxas looked down. The melted half-of-a-pair-of-handcuffs was still on his wrist, the end of the chain a melted and re-solidified mess. Roxas looked at his hand, then- his other hand. He turned it over and looked at his palm, as though surprised that it was uninjured. Had he really not done that trick with the heat before?

Sora actually wasn't that surprised. The thing about superpowers was, you didn't always know what you could do with them until you had to do it- and then you either found out your capabilities were more than you thought they were, or- well- you didn't.

It hadn't been life-or-death for Roxas. Not this time. But apparently Roxas had been pretty invested in the whole escaping thing.

The thing was- Sora could understand why. He could imagine being trapped in that basement, because he'd been there. But Sora had had faith that he'd get out of there, free in his own body again. Roxas, on the other hand, had just been waiting for someone to figure out how to kill him without hurting Sora. It had to have been a nightmare for him.

Sora shouldn't have cared what it was like for Roxas. Roxas was the enemy. Roxas was possessing him. Roxas was terrible to Sora's friends, had tried to hurt Kairi, was part of the Organization that had nearly done worse than any of that to Riku.

But Roxas was afraid of the dark, and he had a best friend, and he had been alone in that basement with no hope of escaping on his own. Roxas was too human to hate. Sora wouldn't go as far as to say that he liked him- there was too much animosity between them for that- but it was hard to outright hate him.

Sora had a plan for what to do about getting out of here already. He'd wait until he was back at full strength. Then, he'd wait for a chance when Roxas was sleeping. It seemed like sometimes Sora woke up before Roxas. He'd high-tail it back to Riku's place, and that would be that. He was sure Riku had been on the verge of figuring out what to do about Roxas. It would be a piece of cake. Roxas thought he had Sora 100% under control right now. He wouldn't take precautions.

Sora would only get one chance at this. But he was pretty sure he could do it.

Too bad he couldn't teleport. That would be an awesome power to have. He would just have to wait for a moment of inattention on Roxas's part, and zap, he'd be back at Riku's place. He’d have to make friends with someone who had that power ASAP. It would be so useful.

"Axel!" Roxas rasped again, and when no reply came, he slumped down onto the bed again and closed his eyes.

The door opened a moment later. Roxas's eyes opened in time to see Axel come into the room. "I thought I heard you," he said. "I'm glad you're awake." He smiled, and it actually looked sincere.

Oh. So Axel was Roxas' friend. The one who didn't trust him.

Roxas frowned. "I think I have a concussion or something. And a bit of retrograde amnesia."

Ah-ha. That had been the phrase Sora had been searching for, a moment earlier. Retrograde amnesia.

Then Roxas seemed to cut herself off. "What about you, Axel? You rescued me. Are you hurt? What exactly happened? Why did you even come? Riku could have killed you. When you showed up I was so worried."

Axel gave him a look. "Me? I'm fine. You're the one who was locked up in a basement for a week and a half surrounded by enemies. And then, to make it all better, I botched the rescue attempt and nearly killed you myself with all the smoke I made."

Roxas scoffed, and it turned into a cough, as though to prove Axel right. If Sora had been awake, the cough would have healed in moments. Roxas didn’t have Riku’s healing powers like Sora did, though.

"The rest of the Organization thought you were dead," Axel said. "But you know I like proving them wrong. It's the only fun I get around here." His tone was carefully light. "I hired a healer, by the way. You aren't actually concussed. Just bruised. You'll be fine." Then, a little too casually, he added, "You looked fine otherwise," Axel said. “No bruises. No scars. You’re in better condition than I expected.”

“Yeah,” Roxas said. “I let Sora out for a bit, when I needed to heal.”

Axel frowned. “If you need to talk about it-" he started.

"No. It's- they didn't really hurt me much. Except the one time. I nearly escaped. We fought. They didn't- they wouldn't have wanted to hurt Sora."

Axel nodded. "Good. I was worried- Never mind. It doesn't matter. I'm just glad you're okay."

"You thought they were going to torture me," Roxas said.

Sora wanted to shout out, "What?" As if Riku and Kairi would torture anyone. Roxas had to know that they were nice people. He'd been spying on them long enough, after all.

Axel didn't answer. He just stared at Roxas. Sora didn't know him well enough to guess what he was thinking. Then he seemed to shake off whatever thoughts he was having, and said, "Xemnas will want a report on everything. The usual."

Roxas let out a little, hollow laugh. "Like I learned anything, trapped in the dark there. Except that I'm not cut out for actual combat."

Axel shook his head. "You haven't had much practice. That's all. I've been fighting since I joined the Organization. You've been spying. Your role is important, too."

"Some spy I am," Roxas said. "I got caught."

"It was bound to happen sooner or later," Axel said. "No one's perfect. But hey, everything will be okay now. You'll have a little time to recover before you get another mission, and then we can get back to work. Nothing has really changed."

"Right," Roxas said." He shook his head. "I'm going to get the rest of these handcuffs off. Can you stand back for a sec?"

Axel did so, and Roxas held up his left arm, handcuffs and all, and pointed his right index finger at them.

The laser beam that came out of his finger melted through the handcuffs easily, and also looked kind of stupid, like they were in a comic book or something. Not that Sora really had any right to talk. He was sure that he looked like he was from a comic book himself, when he used Riku's super-strength.

Then Roxas stood shakily, and said, "I need a shower. I must reek."

Axel made no argument to that. He walked Roxas to the bathroom as though afraid he might break, and said, "Shout if you fall down or something."

Roxas glared at him. Axel just shrugged. "You have a head injury. It could happen."

Roxas made it through the shower uneventfully, though. Shampooing his head hurt like heck, but Sora was glad to get the grime and- was that blood? It was- out of his hair.

Being clean was kind of spoiled by wearing clothes that Sora had never seen before, and which he was sure Roxas must have bought with Sora's own money at some point. It was like having his face rubbed in the fact that he wasn't in control at all. Again.

He ignored that. He focused on spying, on paying close attention to the house they were in. It was some kind of safe house, he'd gathered over the past half-hour or so. It wasn't Roxas' first time here, because he didn't seem curious at all about his surroundings.

Once Roxas was dressed, Axel found him. With a grim expression, he said, "Xemnas wants to see you now."

"Already?" Roxas asked. But then he just shook his head. "I'll go.” He put on his shoes and made for the door of his room.

“Roxas?” Axel said, as Roxas walked out of his room.

“Yeah?”

“Be careful, okay?”

Roxas shrugged, and left.

The safe house looked mostly like an old house, with a living room and bedrooms. Roxas’s room was on the second floor. That was most of what Sora got to spy on, in the moments Roxas walked around. The first floor looked just like an old house, in need of serious redecorating but not otherwise notable. Outside the windows, Sora saw a large yard, and other houses down the block. It looked like suburbs, still. Good. He’d known that the Organization couldn’t be too far from the main city, but it was nice to have some confirmation.

Roxas stepped outside. They were on a main road, but it wasn’t one Sora recognized. Must not be the northwest suburbs, then. Sora knew those too well to be lost.

There was a cluster of office buildings across the way. Roxas tucked his hands into the pockets of his jeans, and, after waiting for a couple cars, crossed the street and went into the closest one.

Sora wasn’t sure what he’d expected of the Organization. A huge imposing lair, maybe. He realized now that that didn’t make sense. He and Riku had been fighting the Organization wherever they found them for the past year, and they’d never figured out where they were meeting. Anything that stood out would have been way too obvious.

In any case, it looked like any other office building. There was a reception desk, though no one was sitting at it, and there were a couple chairs for people to sit in while they waited. A couple of signs made it clear that this was a doctor’s office, and that the receptionist would be back “momentarily”.

Roxas took the elevator. There didn’t seem to be any security in the building, which made sense when Sora thought about it. The Organization was an evil league of supers. They didn’t need security- they were each deadly to the average human being.

 The elevator was slow. Sora could still feel every bruise that Riku had inflicted on Roxas during their last fight. He remembered what Roxas had said, before- that he’d “let Sora out” when he needed to heal. Sora was sure there was more to it than that, though- Roxas hadn’t just let Sora out for that reason. He’d wanted conversation, and Sora wasn’t so sure he could keep Sora locked in this corner of his mind indefinitely anyway. Ansem hadn’t had full control of Riku’s body until Riku was nearly gone. And Sora wasn’t gone. Not even close yet.

If Riku didn’t rescue Sora fast, Sora would just figure out a way to rescue himself.

The elevator dinged when it reached the top floor. Roxas stepped out into a huge white room.

The space in the room was bigger on the inside than the building had looked outside. Sora was no architect, but he had a feeling the dimensions of the building didn’t add up right. Like, maybe someone in the Organization had space-manipulating powers. That was a scary thought. Then again, maybe the building was just bigger than it looked. It wasn’t like Sora had been able to get a good look when he couldn’t even control the direction his eyeballs were pointing.

Sitting at a desk at the end of the room was a man of indeterminate age. His hair was gray, but his face was fairly youthful. “Ah,” he said. “Roxas.”

“Xemnas,” Roxas replied, tone edging close to impolite but not quite there.

What followed was pretty dull. Roxas told Xemnas how he’d been captured, and about what he’d learned during his imprisonment. Not much, Sora was happy to hear, though he’d pretty much known that already.

“I have a mission for you now,” Xemnas said, once Roxas had finished his short report.

Roxas frowned, but didn’t complain.

Xemnas passed a folder to Roxas. “The details are in here. Finish up quickly. This will be your only mission for today.”

Roxas nodded.

Half an hour later, after reading the report and throwing it on his bed back in his room, Roxas was standing on a nearby corner, catching the cross-town bus. Sora shouldn’t have been surprised by the bus- why would Roxas know how to drive?

He kept himself all hunched over the whole time, with his hood up. Sora could tell he didn’t like public transportation.

They passed a few landmarks Sora knew, which meant he could place the Organization’s headquarters as being only about a half hour drive from his house. There was a warehouse district in between, where not many people went these days. Sora’s mom had explained it when Sora was little- something about the manufacturing jobs going to the mainland, and nothing being left on the island. Abandoned warehouses bordered the river, and there were old disused docks there, which had long ago been replaced by others further down the river, towards the coast.

The docks were where Roxas found Xemnas’ thug, after a bit of a walk from the bus stop. Scotch was his name, and he didn’t look like much of a threat. He was skinny, arms poking out of his loose green t-shirt like twigs, and his legs didn’t look much better- his jeans looked like they were falling off of him. Sora thought, with a little relief, that Roxas wouldn’t have too much trouble beating him. Not that Sora wanted anyone to be captured by the Organization, even one of its former goons, but he also didn’t want Roxas to die and take Sora with him.

He hoped the Organization didn’t treat prisoners too badly. He had a feeling they probably weren’t very forgiving, though, to those who betrayed them.

Scotch saw Roxas only a second after Roxas spotted him.

“I was wondering who they’d send after me,” Scotch said. “Thought I’d at least merit someone with real powers.”

Roxas ignored the insult. “You going to come quietly, or are we going to do this the hard way?” he asked.

Scotch just laughed. “Kid, you’re in way over your head. Just because you’re a full member of the Organization doesn’t mean you actually know what you’re doing. What are you, fifteen?”

Sora was seventeen, and his birthday was in less than a month. He felt Roxas bristle slightly at that insult, but he still did his best to ignore it.

Did Roxas even have a birthday? Gosh, what if he actually _was_ fifteen? What if Sora was being possessed by someone really young? Roxas certainly didn’t seem any older than Sora- didn’t seem a lot younger, either, though, so probably he was around the same age. Sora wasn’t sure why that was a relief, but it was.

“Guess you’re choosing the hard way,” Roxas said, pulling his hoodie off and tossing it to the ground. He stepped a step back into the sun, where, Sora remembered a second later, Roxas’s powers would be stronger.

The little bit of eye-dazzling that came from stepping into sunlight was all that Scotch was waiting for. He moved, fast enough that Sora didn’t see what he was doing. There was a boom, and it was only as Roxas stared down at the sudden bullet hole in his stomach that Sora realized that movement had been Scotch pulling a gun from the back of his pants.

Roxas dropped to his knees, hand covering the wound. The pain was intense. Sora had felt worse, but not recently.

_Ansem reaching_ into _his chest, grabbing something vital, something that should have been intangible, and shattering it-_

He hadn’t thought about guns. Hadn’t remembered that, hey, regular people could be just as deadly as supers.

Scotch walked over to where Roxas had now collapsed onto the ground. Roxas made a feeble move to point his finger at Scotch. Sora recognized the move from earlier- Roxas’s dorky-looking laser beam.

Scotch stepped on his hand, hard. There was an audible snapping sound, and Sora knew that at least one finger was broken.

They weren’t getting out of this one. Sora might have managed, but Roxas wasn’t a fighter. He didn’t have superstrength or any sort of healing powers. And Sora could feel Roxas’s pain, could feel that there was no way he could even stand up, let alone fight back.

“Doesn’t seem like the hard way to me,” Scotch said, laughing a little. Sora felt sick. Any trace of sympathy he felt for Scotch disappeared.

Scotch lowered his gun again, pointing it directly at Sora’s head. At Roxas’s head. “Any last words?”

“Sora,” Roxas said, voice pleading.

And then Sora was in control for the first time since the basement. There was no time to think, no time to plan a good course of action.

He sat up, took another bullet to the shoulder when Scotch missed, and _punched_.

Sora would never be as strong as Riku. Riku was bigger, and Sora had a feeling that the way his powers worked, they were never as strong as the person he was copying them from.

It didn’t make a lot of difference. Sora wasn’t up against Riku. He was up against a non-super, and even with such a poor angle, his punch made Scotch bend over double, wheezing.

Sora’s pinky was still broken, but as Scotch watched, unable to move, it popped back into position, and healed. It was a little bloody, and Sora didn’t want to think about bone poking through his skin, but he did anyway. The bullet holes closed slightly more slowly, but within a moment they were gone, too. One bullet, which had apparently been lodged in his shoulder, popped out on its own and clinked to the ground.

Scotch looked afraid. Normally, Sora didn’t like inspiring that expression. Right now, though, he was okay with it.

Sora stood, and rolled his shoulders a little. The pain was gone now. He reached out and plucked Scotch’s gun from his hand without much effort. He didn’t need superstrength, even. He carefully crushed the end of the barrel, and then tossed it far away in case Scotch got any ideas about it. Sora didn’t know anything about guns, but if there was any chance that that gun was still remotely useful, he wasn’t letting Scotch get hold of it.

Scotch said, “please.” That was the only word he could get out.

Sora said, “I’m not like you. I don’t kill people.”

Scotch looked relieved, though he still couldn’t get another word out.

And then Roxas was in charge again. He said, “I’m turning you in to Xemnas. We’ll let him decide what to do with you.”

Scotch wheezed, nodded.

“The healing thing is just between us,” Roxas said. “Understood?”

Scotch nodded again. Roxas picked his hoodie up from the dirty ground and pulled it on, carefully zipping it all the way up.

The Organization sent a car to pick up Roxas and Scotch, so Roxas didn’t have to take the bus back with Scotch in tow. Sora had never minded taking the bus- his school district didn’t have money for school buses, so he’d taken the city bus to school every day of high school- but he could tell Roxas didn’t like it. He wasn’t sure why. Maybe he was worried, this close to Sora’s house, that someone might recognize him. Maybe he just hated public transit.

Sora hoped his mom had put up posters of him or something- he was missing, after all. Depending on how much Riku had told her, he might have been considered missing for nearly two weeks now. Maybe someone would see Roxas and call Sora’s mom, who might tell Riku what was happening, and this whole mess could get sorted out.

He kept an eye out, as much as he could, for any such signs. He didn’t see any. It was kind of a longshot, anyway.

Scotch seemed to recover slightly on the trip back, from what Sora heard of his breathing on the drive back. Roxas was in the front seat and Scotch the back, so it wasn’t like Sora could see him, though.

Roxas reported to Xemnas briefly, leaving out all the parts where Sora had saved his butt. Sora guessed it would look bad that Roxas’d had to rely on Sora’s powers to survive a fight with a non-super.

And then Roxas went back to his room in the safe house, shut the door, and locked it. He pulled the hoodie off, then his bullet-hole-ridden shirt. There was blood around each hole. Roxas examined Sora’s stomach, his shoulder- places he’d been shot. There were no scars, of course. Sora didn’t scar anymore.

Roxas slumped to the floor, shirt still in hand. He leaned against his bed, and took a few deep breaths.

Sora might have said something comforting, in other circumstances. And if he’d had control of his own mouth, to talk with. As it was, that wasn’t even an option.

Roxas sat there for a long time, freaking out, but it couldn’t last forever. After a long while, there was a knock on the door. Roxas said, “Give me a sec!” and threw the ruined shirt in the trash, burying it under a couple tissues and other garbage. Then he pulled the hoodie back on, zipped it, and opened the door.

It was Axel, who leaned against the door-frame, and said: “Thought you might want to know- that guy you just apprehended is dead.”

Roxas blinked. “What?”

“Internal bleeding,” Axel said carelessly. “He died a couple hours after you brought him in.”

Roxas repeated, “What?”

“It happens sometimes,” Axel said. “If you punch someone really hard in the stomach. Nothing you could have known about, but I thought I’d let you know so you weren’t caught unaware by it.” He paused, added, “I know some people in the Organization aren’t... very sensitive.”

“You’re saying I killed someone,” Roxas said, slowly.

Axel hesitated.

Roxas cursed. “Why didn’t someone get him a healer? A doctor? There was plenty of time.”

“No one knew he needed one until the bleeding had just about killed him,” Axel said.

“Shit,” Roxas said.

“Xemnas is happy,” Axel said, as though that were the problem. “It’s just one less loose end.”

This did not make Roxas any less upset. Sora felt like he was going to be sick, and he wasn’t sure if it was him feeling that way, or Roxas. Probably Roxas- he had Sora’s body tightly under control, so his reactions were probably the ones Sora was feeling. Not that Sora wasn’t upset- but he was having trouble telling _how_ upset, exactly, he was, with only Roxas’s feedback from his body, and not his own. It was weird. Sora had thought, before he knew about Roxas, that emotional states probably came straight from the soul. After all, Sora knew that souls existed as a fact. But he guessed it was more complicated than that, because he couldn’t tell how upset he was, and his soul was fine. It was just his body Roxas had.

Sora hated this. It wasn’t the first time he’d thought that, but it hit him now with a lot of force. He hated being so out-of-control. In some ways, it would have been better if he’d stayed asleep while Roxas took over. It would have been easier, anyway.

Roxas would be dead if Sora weren’t awake. _Sora_ would be dead if Sora weren’t awake. If Sora couldn’t heal himself, he was just as vulnerable to injury as anyone else.

He could have died, easily, today. Funny, that he couldn’t feel shocked or panicked about it. He felt so disconnected from himself.

Roxas had been very quiet this whole time. Axel said, “You okay?”

Roxas shook his head. “I’m fine,” he said.

“You’ve never killed anyone before,” Axel said.

Again, Roxas just shook his head. “I’m fine,” he repeated, a little flatly. “I just- I need a little time. It hasn’t sunk in.”

“Okay,” Axel said. “I- okay. Just- find me if you need me, okay? I don’t have any missions lined up for the rest of the day.”

“Alright,” Roxas said.

Axel hesitated a little longer, hovering in the doorway. Then he left. Roxas shut the door carefully, then collapsed on the bed.

“You’ve never killed anyone either,” he said. “How’s it feel?”

It took Sora a minute to realize he had control again.

“I have,” he said, quietly.

Roxas raised one eyebrow, which was a weird sensation when Sora was otherwise in control.

“Ansem,” Sora said. “You forget, I had to kill him to get Riku his body back.”

“That wasn’t killing,” Roxas said. “I was there, watching. You just touched him, and Riku was in control again. Took about three seconds.”

“I shattered his soul,” Sora said. “That’s the part you couldn’t see. He was latched on to Riku’s soul like a leech or something. There was no way to detach them without killing both, so I just- grabbed, and squeezed. Ansem’s soul is in a million little pieces. He’s still attached to Riku, still in his body and attached to his soul, but there’s nothing left of him big enough to grab control.”

“Oh,” Roxas said. “I thought you just- superpowered him back to his body, or something. I wasn’t- I wasn’t as in control back then, as I am now. I slept a lot. I didn’t get the whole story.”

Sora said, “It’s okay. I don’t talk about it much. You wouldn’t have known, I guess.”

Roxas shouldn’t have known any of it. If he didn’t live in Sora’s head, he wouldn’t know anything at all.

Sora had never talked to anyone about that day, not even Riku. Sora guessed Riku knew that Ansem was still inside him- after all, he still had all of Ansem’s powers, and there wasn’t really any other explanation for that. And since he had Ansem’s soul powers, he could look at himself and see what was happening. It wasn’t exactly a secret. But they’d never discussed it. Sora wasn’t sure Riku could even remember exactly what had happened, when he was possessed.

“How did you even use Ansem’s soul powers?” Roxas asked. “I thought your powers were like... friendship-based, or something like that. Ansem wasn’t your friend. I always wondered how that worked.”

Sora thought for a moment before responding, but couldn’t think of a way for Roxas to use the information against him. “Riku is my friend,” he finally said. “And they were attached.” More than attached, they had been the same person at that moment- had been literally joined at the soul. Sora remembered the mess he’d had, the trouble even finding Ansem’s parasitic soul among the wreckage of Riku’s soul.

“Sounds like a technicality to me,” Roxas said.

“Sometimes technicalities can save your life,” Sora said. “Anyway. I think shattering someone’s soul is worse than killing them. If you kill them, they’re just gone. If they’re shattered...”

“He shattered you, first,” Roxas said. “Was it- did it hurt?”

Sora didn’t want to talk about it. So he said, “There would have had to be something left of me, for it to hurt.” He tried to make his tone as final as possible.

Roxas didn’t take the hint. He said, “Then how did you fix yourself?”

Sora said, “I don’t want to talk about it, okay? It was hard. It took weeks, and I was in a coma the whole time, and-“

He was breathing hard.

“I never wanted to kill anyone ever again,” he blurted out. “I thought- I thought my secret identity would be enough, that no one would ever know who I was, that no one would ever come after me or Riku again.”

“I never had a secret identity,” Roxas said quietly. “I’ve just always been me, and I... I didn’t have an identity, period. They could make me do whatever. Not like I’m a person, right?” He paused, but didn’t give Sora a chance to say anything. Then, louder, he said, “I wouldn’t even have my own name if-“

He paused for another moment, apparently unsure if he should go on. Then he shook his head, obviously deciding Sora wasn’t a threat. “I wouldn’t have my own name,” he continued, “if Axel hadn’t given me one. It was while you were in the hospital last year, in a coma. Fixing your soul after Ansem broke it, I guess. Anyway. Ansem had names for me, but they weren’t- weren’t real names. He called me the freak, sometimes. Ansem was really into his soul powers, so it really pissed them off that he couldn’t seem to use them on me. Because I don’t have a soul, apparently.”

Roxas stated this all matter-of-fact, but Sora could tell it all pained him. He could feel it.

Roxas shook his head. “Anyway. Axel was my guard. They knew something was weird about you, mostly because I existed, but they didn’t know you were a meta. Axel was overkill, they thought, but he’s always been a bit of a wildcard, and I guess they wanted him out of the way for a while. So he was my guard. And when I was awake, we talked. He said, if I wasn’t you, I needed a name. So he called me Roxas. It’s just your name, jumbled up. With an X in it. Because he said, I was ex-Sora... It made more sense at the time, I guess.”

He said, “Axel told me everything the Organization knew about you. Even before you woke up, we figured I’d be taking over your life. Not as a spy, just as my identity. There was no reason to spy on you, then. You seemed brain-dead when I wasn’t awake, and they weren’t even sure I had powers. That came later. You don’t have to have powers to be part of the Organization.”

“Why are you telling me all this?” Sora asked, when Roxas finally gave him back control, and he could get a word in edgewise.

Roxas took a long moment to reply. Finally, he said: “I know you, even though you don’t know me very well yet. And- I trust you, even if that’s sort of nuts. Besides, it’s not like you’re ever going to have a chance to betray me. Uh.”

That feeling of trust wasn’t mutual. Not now, not ever, Sora vowed. But he could tell Roxas was sincere. There was a warm sort of feeling in his chest, and he knew it belonged to Roxas. He found himself resenting that feeling. He didn’t want to know how Roxas felt. He didn’t want to get to know him. He wanted Roxas gone, banished back to wherever he belonged. (Not dead though, Sora’d had enough killing. First Ansem and now Scotch, and Sora had known when he realized that he was a meta that people might try to kill him, but he hadn’t thought that through and realized that he might have to kill to survive. He hadn’t _wanted_ to think it though.)

It wasn’t Roxas’s fault, though. None of it was. If it had been Sora who woke up in that hospital room, alone and friendless and without even a name, wouldn’t he have latched on to the first person who was nice to him? Maybe he would have joined the Organization too, until he was in so deep that he couldn’t get out.

He was glad it hadn’t been him. He was sure it would have broken him, to be so alone.

This was exactly what he hadn’t wanted to do. Sympathy was the last thing he needed to feel for Roxas.

This was all temporary, anyway. Even if Sora couldn't find a way free on his own, Riku would come for him. Sora just had to wait. And, well, Sora didn’t like waiting, but he knew Riku would never leave him here alone. Friends didn’t do that. Kairi would help too- she was the smart one. Sora had always been a little naïve and never done well at school, and Riku was fine with book smarts but he was dumb enough to get possessed by the first person to try to use him for his powers. But Kairi- she had it all. Sora had always admired her for that.

Sora missed them both so much it hurt, and that was kind of a relief- that he could still feel something. It didn’t make things okay, but it made them a little better than the numbness he'd been feeling.

He still hoped Riku would come soon. He didn't want to have to kill anyone else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Scotch is named after a VERY minor villain in FF7.


	4. Sea Salt

Over the rest of the next week or so, Roxas was sent on three more missions to fetch people. The people he was sent to fetch were a lot more cooperative than Scotch had been. Sora was glad. He didn't ever want to be that close to death again. He didn't want to have to kill anyone ever again. Sora wanted to be a good guy, but when it came down to it, if it were him or someone else again, he wasn't sure what he would do. He didn't like what that said about him, but he couldn't deny it. He'd killed Ansem. He'd killed Scotch. Sora couldn't very well call himself innocent anymore. He was a murderer.

Roxas was strangely considerate over the days that followed Scotch's murder. While he didn't give Sora much control, he gave him enough to talk from time to time. That was good- Sora thought he might go insane if he spent any longer cooped up in his own head. It was like solitary confinement or something, some sort of cruel and inhumane torture.

Sora was the kind of guy who had trouble reading a book because he got antsy sitting still. Being in his own head without any way to move was horrible. Even talking to Roxas was better than that.

They didn't really have that much to talk about, was the problem. Roxas was willing to check the local newspaper and verify that Riku and Kairi had escaped the fire Axel had set. Riku was unharmed, of course, though whether that was thanks to the healing powers he had, or because he actually hadn't been burnt badly, there was no way of knowing. Kairi had made it out with "minor injuries."

"I want to call them," Sora said.

"Are you kidding?" Roxas said. "What would you even say?"

Sora shook his head. He didn't know what he would say. He just wanted to hear Riku or Kairi's voices.

"What about my mom?" Sora said. "She's got to be worried. She doesn't know about anything. She doesn't know I'm a super. She must think I've been kidnapped or something."

Roxas didn't dignify Sora's pleading with a response. But he didn't stop Sora from talking, either. Maybe he felt bad. Maybe, if Sora just kept pressing, Roxas would let him call someone. Maybe.

When he wasn't talking, when he was just motionless in the back of his head, it was harder to be hopeful. Every hour that he waited for rescue, he found it harder and harder to stay cheerful. Not that he'd been doing a super great job to start with.

"If I can't call anyone," Sora said, "can we at least go get some ice cream?"

Ice cream was a safe request. A stupid one, but at least it was something to get out of the safe house for.

"Fine," Roxas said.

 

* * *

 

Axel gave Roxas money, sometimes, saying it was from Xemnas. Always cash, because how would Roxas even have a bank account? Roxas didn't officially exist, and Sora was sure that by now there was a missing-person report out there with his name on it, so it wasn't like Roxas could use Sora's identity either. Mostly, Roxas stowed his earnings under the mattress in his room, keeping only a little in his (in _Sora's_ ) wallet.

Roxas didn't buy much. New shoes, because the ones he had were starting to fall apart. A couple more changes of clothes, bought from thrift stores where Roxas kept his head down and didn't talk to anyone. The occasional take-out dinner. And once, the second day he was back, he went to a tiny shop in a nearby mall and got an ice cream on a stick, which he let Sora eat.

Sora hadn't eaten in a long time, it felt like. He hadn't starved- Roxas ate, and that was enough to nourish them both- but it was different, being in control of his own mouth. Even though it tasted the same both ways, it was better when he got to lick his own ice cream, somehow. Maybe just because he was in control.

Sora had nearly started crying in public, then, and Roxas had taken control back, so it hadn't been an unqualified success of a trip.

Sora wasn't sure why he even wanted to go back to the mall. It just felt like freedom, to go somewhere he had picked, and- well, there wasn't really any other option to choose from.

They took the bus, even though they probably could have walked. It was getting a little chilly to walk, Sora supposed. Fall was giving way to winter, and even though it was sunny out, the wind had a bite to it.

Once off the bus, Roxas walked them purposefully towards the ice cream shop. Sora looked around a little out of the corner of his eyes. He was getting the hang of looking around that way. Not that he had much choice.

It was Sunday, and the mall was busy. Sora liked crowds, liked the bustle of people shopping and chatting with each other. Roxas, he had figured out already, really didn't. He tensed up every time they went somewhere crowded. Sora didn't exactly _enjoy_ making Roxas uncomfortable, since he could feel Roxas' discomfort, but he had to admit there was still a certain satisfaction to it.

Roxas let Sora order his ice cream- a scoop of sea salt flavor on a stick, which, annoyingly, was Roxas' favorite flavor too- and once it was ready he sat them down at a table in the corner, where they were mostly out of the way.

Sora ate the ice cream slowly, savoring it. If he was honest with himself, he was eating it too slowly. It was dripping on his hands, and he had to keep licking his fingers to get the melt off. Roxas's disgust was palpable. Sora continued anyway.

He was almost done when a voice said, " _Sora_?"

Roxas's head snapped up, startled, and he dropped Sora's ice cream.

It was Tidus, who Sora shared a math class with. _Had_ shared a math class with, he guessed. Not like he was in school anymore.

"It is you," Tidus said, looking confused. "What the hell, Sora, your mom has posters up all around the school saying you were _kidnapped_."

"Shit," Roxas said, standing up. For a moment, Sora could feel the fight-or-flight response kick in. Roxas's eyes darted around, looking for escape routes. But, Sora realized, probably at the same time Roxas did, running would just draw attention to him, and Tidus didn't look like he was going to just let Roxas leave, anyway.

Fighting wasn't an option either. Right now, only Tidus had noticed Sora. If Roxas fought his way out of this situation, did something to Tidus here, someone was going to get a picture of him on their smartphone. And that would lead Riku to this mall just as surely as Tidus would. And the mall was only a mile or so from the Organization's hideout.

Roxas sat back down, took a deep calming breath, and said, "Tidus. You can't tell anyone you saw me here."

"Like hell I'm not," Tidus said. "Sora, what are you _doing_?"

Tidus's voice had raised in volume over the course of that sentence. Several people were staring at them. Roxas pulled the hood of his hoodie lower, obviously trying to obscure his face.

" _Shut up,"_ Roxas said.

But Tidus just looked angrier.

"Even if something went wrong at home," he said, "You left without telling anyone where you were going. You didn't tell Riku or Kairi, you didn't tell Selphie, and you didn't tell me. Do you trust us that little?"

Sora trusted them all, and the accusation hurt. But then, it wasn't like he'd kept anyone but Riku and Kairi in the loop, once he'd found out he was a super. A meta. He'd drifted away from everyone. He'd just been so _busy,_ between trying to catch up on school and trying to defeat the Organization.

"You don't have the first idea what's going on," Roxas said, glaring. "And I'm not going to talk to you about it now, either, if you keep making a huge scene."

Tidus took a breath. "Fine." He sat down in the chair opposite Roxas. "Better?"

Roxas sighed. "People are still staring. Come on, we're going somewhere else to talk."

He walked Tidus outside the mall, and Sora wasn't sure what was going on, but he was sure it wasn't good. Roxas wasn't going to let Tidus get away knowing that Sora was in this area.

"Where are we going?" Tidus asked, when they had walked a few blocks.

Sora could tell, already. They were walking to the safe house. But Roxas just said, "Somewhere more private. I'm in hiding, okay? I don't want tons of people to notice me." He smiled at Tidus, linked his hands behind his head. It didn't feel genuine, but apparently it was a good enough impression of Sora, because Tidus relaxed.

It was just like the basement, when Roxas had tried to hurt Kairi, except that Sora had no idea what was going to happen next, what Roxas's plan was. He only knew that he could do nothing to stop it.

They made it to the safe house, which, as usual, was pretty empty. Roxas kicked his shoes off at the door and Tidus followed suit.

"Nice place," Tidus said neutrally.

Roxas shrugged, and led Tidus upstairs. They didn't go to Roxas's room though, or even to Axel's, where Roxas spent a lot of time when he was free. Instead they went up another flight of stairs and Roxas knocked on the attic door.

"Yes?" a girl's voice said.

"Hey," Roxas said. "Namine, can we talk for a minute?"

The girl that opened the door looked sort of familiar. That is, Sora had seen her making herself some lunch in the kitchen once before, but since Roxas hadn't talked to her then, Sora hadn't known her name. She was blonde. Blue eyes. Pale. She reminded him, just a little, of Kairi- not so much her looks, but the way she held herself. He missed his friends all over again.

Namine looked from Roxas to Tidus in confusion.

"Can we step in?" Roxas said. "I have a small problem I was hoping you could help with. This is Tidus. He's a friend from school. I ran into him at the mall."

Tidus looked annoyed at being called a problem, but Namine looked less confused and more- resigned.

"Sure," she said. "Come on in."

They stepped in, and as Tidus stepped in, Namine lifted one hand and brushed it against his forehead. His eyes lost focus for a moment, and then he collapsed in the doorway. Roxas and Namine let him drop to the floor.

"There," Namine said. "I wiped the past few hours. How much cleanup do we need to do?"

"No one else noticed me," Roxas said. "He was alone."

"I can't plant any false memories," Namine said. "I don't know enough about him to plant anything convincing, and I'm guessing we don't have a few days while I pick his brain."

"It would probably be best if we just take him home," Roxas said. "I can't do it, though- his parents would recognize me. It would just cause problems."

Sora was still working out exactly what had happened. Had Namine just erased Tidus's memories of what had just happened? Sora had known someone in the Organization had to have the power to mess with memories. They had messed with Sora's, after all. But he hadn't known who it was. Hadn't known it was someone who looked so- well, innocent.

He should know better. Looks were just about the least reliable way of telling what someone was like on the inside. No matter how sweet she seemed, Namine was still part of the Organization. She was still Sora's enemy.

Namine made a phone call and reported what had happened, presumably to one of their superiors in the Organization. Once she had ended the call, she turned back to Roxas.

"It's going to be taken care of," she said. "Your friend won't wake up for a while. Would you help me carry him down the stairs?"

"He isn't really my friend," Roxas said. "He's Sora's."

"I know," Namine said.

Sora wasn't so sure about that, even. He couldn't remember the last time he'd talked to Tidus to say more than a few words. And sure, Sora had always been closer to Riku and Kairi, but that was no excuse for ignoring his other friends.

 

 _Tidus had saved Sora's life once, though Tidus didn't know about it. It was over a year ago now. Sora had been worried about Riku, mostly, and he'd been trying to gather information about the Organization. They'd been meeting at the docks, then- the other docks, the ones on the coast- and Sora had hidden behind a storage container, trying to figure out why Riku was acting so_ weird _._

_They'd found him there before too long. He hadn't even known they were supers at that point, just that they seemed really shady. Ansem had looked at him coldly, and said, "Get rid of him." Sora didn't remember which of them grabbed him, then, but they tied him up and threw him in the water out at sea._

_Sora remembered- he'd thought of Tidus then. Tidus was the only super that Sora had known at the time, and his power would have been so useful then. Water-breathing._

_It had been night, and dark, and Sora hadn't stayed conscious in the water for long. It was morning by the time he washed up on shore. He woke up further down the coast. He'd coughed up so much salt water once he woke up, and puked his guts out- but somehow he'd been alive, though a little beat up._

_Now he realized he'd probably used Tidus's power on accident. At the time it had been bewildering. Sora hadn't known he was a meta. He hadn't known he was even a super. He'd had no idea how he hadn't drowned._

 

He wondered- was Tidus still a close enough friend that Sora could even use his powers? He didn't even know how to test that without getting control back from Roxas and dunking himself in the ocean. He didn't know if it was a question that even made sense. How close did someone have to be, for him to use their powers? Mostly he just relied on Riku's powers. It wasn't like he knew a ton of supers. Plus, Riku had more powers than he knew what to do with, since Ansem had left him with so many after the whole possession thing. He had healing, super-strength, soul powers- probably more too, that they hadn't figured out yet. Ansem had been possessing people and stealing their powers for a long time.

While Sora thought, Roxas and Namine were busy dragging Tidus down the stairs and to the first floor. They weren't especially gentle about it, though at least Roxas made sure that Tidus didn't hit his head.

To be fair, neither of them were very strong, and Tidus was pretty heavy. It would have been hard to be gentle.

They left him leaning against an easy chair in the room that passed for a living room in the safe house. And then Namine said, "I should probably wipe Sora's memories, too, while we wait."

Roxas turned his head sharply to face her.

"What? Why? I'm not spying anymore."

"It's better if we keep him as confused as possible about where he is and why he's here. Those are Xemnas's orders."

Roxas shook his head. "I don't want him confused. Do you know how weird it is to have someone else in your head, let alone someone who's completely disoriented? When he has strong emotions, I feel them too."

Sora hadn't known it went both ways.

Namine's expression was concerned. But she didn't look convinced.

"Forget keeping him in the dark," Roxas said. "I think I'm close to real cooperation from him. Do you know what it would mean, if we had a meta working for the Organization? Sora could be an asset instead of a liability."

Sora was never going to be an asset. But he didn't want to have his memories messed with, either.

Roxas said, "We're friends, right, Namine?"

At that, Namine's expression softened. "Of course we are," she said. "But... Xemnas's orders."

"I'll talk to Xemnas," Roxas said. "Soon. Once I have some definite proof that I can get Sora to cooperate. But in the meantime..."

Namine bit her lip. "I don't know, Roxas. I can't lie to the leader of the Organization."

"Don't, then," Roxas said, his tone going hot. "If you can't lie for me-"

Namine's hands clenched into fists, but she didn't look angry, exactly. She was trembling.

Jeez, Sora thought. Even the Organization was terrified of the Organization. Would they kill Namine, if they found out she had lied? Or was she too valuable for that?

"I'll do it," she said. "I'll lie for you. Just- hurry, okay? Don't make me lie for long."

"Of course," Roxas said.

There didn't seem to be much to say, then. Namine left for her attic room again soon after. Roxas stayed to keep an eye on Tidus for a few more minutes, until someone Sora didn't recognize came to take him home.

Roxas went back to his own room then, and shut the door.

"I'm sticking my neck out for you," Roxas murmured. "I hope you appreciate it."

He didn't give Sora a chance to respond, though. Instead, he flopped down on his bed.

"I know you're unhappy," he said, after a moment. "I can feel it. That wasn't a lie. And I don't know if there's anything I can do to fix that. I'm not going to let Riku kill me. This isn't a safe place, but it's a safer place for me than there. I don't want to die."

Sora understood that feeling.

"I hate sitting still," Sora said, quietly, when Roxas gave him a chance to talk. He hated himself a little for asking anything from Roxas, but he needed this. "If I could just- walk. Sometimes. I might feel a little less like a prisoner. I know you can stop me any time, anyway, but if you keep me locked up in my own head all the time, I'm going to go insane."

"I can do that," Roxas said. "But- you can't try to run away, or try to tell your friends where you are. I would stop you, don't get me wrong, but- I don't want to be on edge all the time, if I give you control for a minute."

"Fine," Sora said, hating himself even more for agreeing to Roxas's terms. "It's not like it would make a difference."

He was lying, anyway, he told himself. If an opportunity came, he'd take it. If Riku found him, or he saw someone he knew- he'd take that chance, even if it meant betraying Roxas's trust.

Roxas probably knew that. It was mind games all over again. Sora hated mind games.

"And obviously," Roxas said, "don't tell anyone you're Sora. If you encounter someone from the Organization, you're Roxas. Okay? No need to get us both killed, or worse. If they knew I was giving you any freedom at all..."

"Okay," Sora said. He didn't ask what was worse than death. He had no doubt the Organization could inflict it.

Roxas didn't make good on his promise right away, which... well, there had just been the whole mess with Tidus, so it made sense, even if Sora didn't like it.

Instead, Roxas went to Axel's room and knocked. There was no reply. Axel was probably out on a mission. He was always busier than Roxas, Sora had noticed. Maybe Roxas was right- maybe the Organization trusted Axel more than Roxas.

The door to Axel's room was always locked, but Roxas pulled out his keys and opened it. Sora hadn't realized that was what that key opened. Roxas hadn't used it, at least in the past week while Sora was awake and aware.

There wasn't much to Axel's room. A couple photos and a poster taped to the wall, a bookshelf with a half-dozen books on it, and a bed, haphazardly made. That was all.

It looked more-or-less like a college dorm room, though emptier, and when Sora thought of it that way, he realized that Axel was probably around college age. Not that much older than Sora, really. Weird, how so many people close to Sora's age were wrapped up in the Organization's plans. He guessed it sort of made sense. Get them while they were young and stupid, too cocky to back away from an evil super league while they had the chance.

Sora had thought, once, that if he just took out the leader of the Organization, he would take out the whole group. That it would just dissolve without Ansem to hold it together. Now he saw that it was a lot more complicated than he'd thought. When Ansem had died, Xemnas had just risen to take his place. And if Sora took out Xemnas, there might be others waiting to rise in the ranks, ready for more power.

It wasn't enough to fight the supers and hope that they ran out of people strong enough to fight him. They were _organized._ Which, he guessed the name sort of implied that. But, if he wanted to stop them from recruiting more people, he had to figure out why people were joining, and why they stayed when it became obvious that the Organization was rotten.

Roxas went for one of the books on the shelf. Great. The guy in Sora's head had to be a bookworm. Sora mentally groaned at Roxas, and Roxas-

Roxas looked around, like he'd heard something.

Sora remembered, then- he'd made Roxas hear something in the basement, too, hadn't he? He'd forgotten, in all the confusion since then.

This could be useful. It had been useful in the basement, even if Sora hadn't expected to be heard. It had been a distraction.

Logically, he had to keep this development to himself. If they were playing mind games, Sora couldn't afford to let an advantage go. Hopefully Roxas hadn't figured out what had just happened.

Of course, he immediately thought of about a million things he wanted to say. That was premature, he knew- he didn't know why Roxas had heard him some times but not others. He didn't know if Roxas was even hearing more than a whisper, or noise. Just because Sora was saying things didn't mean Roxas was hearing those same things.

He could test it out.

No, that was a bad idea. Anything Sora knew that Roxas didn't was something precious right now. He'd been spied on for so long that Roxas knew almost everything about him. Everything but this.

Roxas grabbed the book again, and exited the room. As he was locking the door behind him, a voice said, "Ah, there you are. I was wondering where the freak had wandered off."

Sora knew that voice, but he still had a hard time believing it.

Roxas turned.

Standing there with a cold look on his face was Riku.

Sora was finally going to be rescued.


	5. Coffee

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for self-injury? Scroll to End Notes for details.

There was something wrong with Riku's face. His smile was all wrong, and when Sora looked harder, he realized that Riku held himself differently than usual.

He didn't want to think about that too hard.

Roxas tensed up, prepared for a fight. "Sora's gone," he said. "Namine wiped his memories clean. If you're here to retrieve your friend, you're too late." He was a good liar, eyes steady on Riku's, but his heart was pounding too fast.

Something flickered in Riku's eyes, but it was quickly gone, replaced by something like amusement. "Good," he said. "There are more than enough pests here to deal with. Can you believe that that upstart Xemnas thought that he could carry on in my place?"

Sora thought, _no_.

Roxas, apparently, was having the same thoughts. His eyes narrowed. "Ansem," he said.

_I can fix him_ , Sora said, all previous thoughts of his pathetic secret advantage gone. _Let me out, Roxas._

Roxas jumped, blinked. Ansem smiled, his smirk looking out of place on Riku's face. If Sora had any doubts- any thoughts that Riku might just be faking, trying to get close to Roxas to capture him again- they died there.

_Let me out_ , Sora pleaded again.

Roxas kept control. This time he didn't flinch.

"Guess Xemnas thought you were gone," Roxas commented mildly.

Ansem said, "I'm not that easily defeated. Especially by children who don't know how to use their own powers. It was a minor setback." He smirked again, and brushed past Roxas, apparently unconcerned enough by him to turn his back.

Roxas wasn't nearly as relaxed. He watched Ansem's back the whole time he left. Once Ansem was safely out of sight, and earshot, he swore. Then he retreated to his room, down at the other end of the hallway. He locked the door behind him. Not that that would help.

"We're fucked," Roxas said under his breath. "Sora, he hates me. And he hates you worse. If he figures anything out-"

_He can't kill me_ , Sora said.

"You don't know that," Roxas hissed, apparently too stressed out to even register that Sora hadn't spoken out loud. "If Riku is gone, your powers are gone, too, aren't they? Ansem certainly isn't your friend. If you don't have Riku's powers, you're even more useless than I am."

_One way to check,_ Sora said. _Give me control._

Roxas sighed. "If you shout, or give him any reason to come up here, we're both dead."

_I'm not stupid,_ Sora said. And then, as an afterthought, _Do you have a knife or something?_

Roxas sighed, and dug through the closet on the other side of the room. He didn't come up with a knife, but he did find a lighter. Which made Sora wonder if Roxas was smoking cigarettes with his lungs, and then Sora remembered that even if he was, he was probably immune to cancer. Healing was useful.

_That'll work,_ Sora said.

Roxas grabbed the lighter, and gave Sora control.

Sora didn't give himself time to think, because this was going to hurt either way. He flicked the lighter on, and stuck his finger into the flame.

He had to stop himself from jerking back. The burn was nearly instant, and it hurt right away. He kept his finger in there longer than was probably wise, because he had to make sure there was a burn. It had to be visible and painful if he wanted to see whether it healed.

Then he let the lighter switch off.

He stared at his finger for a while. If it was healing, it sure wasn't instant. The finger he'd burned had a blister on it, which didn't just fix itself. The pain stayed.

"No," Sora murmured. "Come on, heal."

He didn't have any way to push the healing process, to make it faster. He just-

He thought, _Riku_ , the name shot through with feelings and regrets.

 

* * *

 

 

_Sora hadn't ever handled Riku right._

_So the thing was, powers came to people who needed them. Not always, not often enough to be fair, but sometimes. There were studies and pop psychology books about it. Sora had even read one once, before he'd realized he had powers of his own._

_Statistics had never made a lot of sense to Sora, but he'd gotten the gist. People with a lot of trauma in their lives were more likely to develop superpowers. No one really knew where powers came from, or why some people got them and others didn't. Nothing about powers made actual sense- no one knew where the energy to use powers came from, either, since some powers broke the laws of physics in really obvious ways- but they didn't always come from nowhere._

_The point was, Sora should have thought more, when Riku was outed as having healing powers. He should have wondered more. Maybe had a talk with Riku, made sure everything was okay. But he'd been worried for other reasons. Riku had nearly died- had died, for a little while._

_It had been a car crash. Nothing superheroic about it, even in hindsight. A drunk driver had hit Riku as he was biking home from swim practice._

_Riku had lived with Sora and his mom for a couple years, ever since Riku's mom had died of cancer, so it was Sora's mom who got the call. She'd told Sora right away what had happened, and got them both to the hospital to see Riku before-_

_Sora didn't want to think about Riku lying there, completely motionless. The doctors had given them the standard talk, how they'd done everything they could but Riku's injuries had just been too great. Sora just kept staring, as though accepting Riku's death would mean it had really happened._

_Riku had started breathing again, but slowly. Sora was the first to see, but he wasn't sure- couldn't be sure he wasn't just imagining things- until the doctor had turned around and gasped._

_Sora had been too glad Riku was alive to question it. He hadn't thought. He'd asked, "How long have you had_ superpowers, _Riku?"_

_Riku had just shrugged._

_Sora thought a lot about that shrug, but he'd never been sure how to bring it up again._

_The first thing to happen when Riku got home was a local news story about him. No one had ever figured out who leaked the story to the news. In hindsight, Sora suspected that was how Ansem had found out about Riku and his powers._

_The second thing that happened was that Riku got kicked off the swim team. No powers were allowed on any sports team, even unrelated powers. To add insult to injury, they retroactively took away all his medals on the off chance that his healing powers made him a better swimmer._

_Riku hadn't taken it well._

_And then the Organization had come into town, and Riku had been possessed, and- Sora had been busy since then. But he should still have made time to ask about why Riku had powers in the first place, and he never had._

 

* * *

 

 

The burn did heal, but it took a worrying amount of time, minutes instead of seconds. Sora wasn't sure what that meant, but it probably wasn't good.

"He's not gone," Sora said, finally.

"Good," Roxas said emphatically.

He must have felt Sora's surprise.

“I liked your friends,” Roxas added. “When I was spying on them. On you. They’re good friends. Good people. Sometimes I used to wish that... Never mind. Just- you’re lucky, you know?”

It was obvious that this had been on Roxas' mind a lot.

Sora wanted to protest. He sure didn't feel lucky. He was trapped in his own body. Riku was possessed again, and Sora had no way to save him.

"You have friends," Roxas said, sensing Sora's hesitation to agree. "Family. People who care. That's lucky."

_You have Axel_ , Sora said. Namine too, right?

"They don't trust me like I trust them," Roxas said. "Remember when we were in the basement? How Riku was never sure you were you? That's how it was here, for months. Only difference was, you were always confused, so it was more obvious when it was really you."

"I was in control?" Sora asked.

Roxas said, "No. Not- not when I was awake. Don't get your hopes up. I was just a confused mess at first. I slept a lot. Hid sometimes, too, before I figured out my powers. It was a lot safer to be in the back of your head when I was powerless. They could hurt you, but they couldn't kill you. And I really don't want to die."

"Did they hurt me?" Sora asked.

Roxas didn't answer.

"The more I think," Sora said, "the more it feels like the past year was a dream. There are details missing. Like, Riku and I were trying to figure out all the members of the Organization. And we ran into you a few times, right? Never when we were together, though. So those memories have to be fake."

"Yeah," Roxas said. "Namine calls you her art project. She made a ton of memories for you. It's been an ongoing thing." He hesitated. "It's not just the last year."

"What?"

"The fake memories go back farther than that. Namine altered things from before then. You were-" Roxas took a breath. "You were having sort of an existential crisis. It was. Inconvenient. So Namine made you forget about it."

He sounded ashamed.

Sora still didn't understand.

"I think," Roxas continued, "that something happened when you put yourself back together again, after Ansem shattered your soul. Maybe you did it wrong. Maybe pieces went missing. I don't know how it works. I don't have soul powers, and I don't think any of us really know how they work, anyway."

"What do you _mean?"_ Sora asked. "What did I do wrong? You're saying I screwed up my soul, but how would you even know?"

"Because you screwed up your personality, too," Roxas said.

"But I'm the same as always," Sora said. "I would have noticed if I were different!"

"You did," Roxas said. "You just can't remember it anymore."

"I would know now," Sora insisted. "I'm not any different than I... remember." And then he realized. If Namine was altering his memories-

"Like I said," Roxas said, "Namine changed your memories."

Sora said, "Okay." He took a breath before asking the obvious question. "What was I like?"

Roxas said, "I didn't wake up until after everything went down. So I don't know firsthand. But I can make guesses."

"Fine," Sora said. "Guess away."

"You got better grades," Roxas said. "That was the first thing. You studied a lot, read a lot more than you do now. When your grades started to slip, everyone noticed."

"Are you implying I have brain damage?" Sora asked, actually a little freaked out for the first time in this conversation.

"I don't know," Roxas said. "I don't know how souls and brains are connected. That's a big question. But I would guess not. I think it was more a matter of focus. You're still smart-"

Sora mentally scoffed.

"Seriously," Roxas said. "You just use it in different ways. You actually got better at some things, like that literature class you're taking. You just lost the knack for math you had once."

Sora could not even imagine a him that was good at math.

"What else?" he asked.

"You're more outgoing," Roxas said. "Friendlier. More extroverted."

"That's kind of my thing," Sora pointed out.

"It wasn't," Roxas said. "You were shy. I mean, you go to a huge school, but you only have two close friends. There's a reason for that."

Sora had lots of other friends. Tidus. Selphie. Wakka.

None of them were nearly as close as Riku and Kairi, though.

"Okay," he said. "I guess I could buy that. Anything else?"

Roxas shook his head. “Not that I know about.”

"Good," Sora said. He had more urgent things to do now than have an identity crisis.

"What about Riku?" he asked. "What do we do?"

Roxas said, "I don't know. If we go after him, the whole Organization will be on our asses. We'll have to run. And I'm not leaving. I can't leave."

"Why not?" Sora asked. "Roxas, what's keeping you here?"

Roxas was quiet for a long, long time.

“You can't hide things from me if we're going to work together,” Sora said.

"What makes you think we're working together?" Roxas asked. But his tone wasn't as sharp as he probably meant it to be.

Sora waited.

Finally, so quiet that Sora only knew the words by their feel on his own lips, Roxas said, "I can't go without Axel."

There was a feeling behind that, something bone-deep and powerful. But it was gone before Sora could identify it.

"Then we'll take him with us," Sora said. "No problem."

"He won't come," Roxas said. "He doesn't trust me. And- he's my best friend, but I'm not sure how important I am to him."

"He came to rescue you from Riku's basement," Sora pointed out. "He couldn't have known he'd win against Riku. He risked his life to save you. Roxas, he cares about you."

Roxas said, "You really think so?"

Sora said, "I'm sure."

Roxas shook his head, but Sora could tell he was hopeful. The feeling Sora got was...vulnerable. "If I help you," Roxas said, "you have to promise to keep Riku from killing me after. I'm doing this partly to help you, and because I like your friends- but I'm mostly doing it to save my own ass, okay? And there's nothing in it for me if I'm dead both ways."

"I didn't want him to kill you," Sora said. "I never wanted that. I might have let him, though, at first, to save myself. But I know you, now. I can't let someone die if I know them!"

Roxas raised an eyebrow at that. Sora had to admit it wasn't the most coherent code of ethics ever thought up.

"You'll be safe," Sora said, firmly. And then, "You've kind of grown on me. I think, if we'd met under different circumstances, we could have been really good friends."

Roxas let that hang in the air a little while, and then said, "You're a huge dork."

Sora smiled. "I'm just saying that- and this is going to sound totally irrational, because it is totally irrational- I trust you."

"Dork," Roxas accused again, but even though he kept the pleased tone out of his voice, he couldn't keep it out of his brain. Or heart. Or something. So Sora felt it.

They hadn't really solved anything yet. Sora and Roxas were going to have to work out a plan together to convince Axel to come along with them and Riku when they ran. But for the first time since this whole mess started, Sora had a feeling that things were going to work out.

That feeling lasted about twenty seconds, because then there was an explosion somewhere outside.

"Shit," Roxas said. The conversation was over then, because he rushed out- stopping for a second to lock his door- to see what the noise had been.

There was no one else around when Roxas got outside. But when he looked over at the office building that was the Organization's headquarters, the top floor was a smoking ruin.

"Shit," Roxas repeated.

Sora had to echo his feelings, even if he wouldn't have used the same words.

He saw someone go flying out of the wreckage- wearing black, so it could be _literally any member of the Organization in uniform_ \- but the fight that was going on was clearly not over. The figure jumped as if against an invisible surface in midair, and went back into the destroyed top floor.

There were noises after that. The sound of falling rubble. A couple of explosions. But Sora couldn't tell what was happening.

He wanted to rush in and see what was happening. Luckily, Roxas seemed to share this desire. He stepped towards the building.

Then, Axel and a few others ran out of the front door.

"Stop gawking and run," Axel said, grabbing Roxas's arm and dragging him along- not towards the safe house, but down the road.

"What's happening?" Roxas asked, running beside Axel.

"Ansem is back," Axel said. "Xemnas isn't happy. They're fighting."

_Riku_ , Sora thought. _Roxas, he could be in trouble._

Roxas didn't respond. Sora guessed it would be hard to. He couldn't talk to Sora aloud without looking crazy, and Roxas didn't seem to be able to do the silent response thing, probably because he'd never needed to. He had full control.

_We have to go back_ , Sora said.

His only response was a slight, almost imperceptible shake of Roxas's head as he ran.

Once they were a few blocks away, they slowed down to a more reasonable pace. It was just Axel and Roxas now. The others had split off to go other ways.

"I need to get out of this coat," Axel said. "No need to attract more attention. The police are going to be here soon. Explosion's going to gather enough of a crowd."

Organization members wore regular clothes under the coat, so it was just a matter of finding an alleyway with a dumpster to ditch the coat in. Roxas was just wearing regular clothes, so he didn't have a coat to ditch.

There was a coffee shop nearby, which they ducked into. Roxas warily looked around, but was apparently satisfied that there was no danger here.

They ordered coffee and sat in the corner. The shop wasn't too crowded this late in the afternoon, but it was still busy enough that they were inconspicuous. They sat in silence for a little while. Roxas didn't touch his coffee, which sort of made sense- Sora thought coffee was nasty, and Roxas was sharing his taste buds, so it probably tasted pretty bad to him, too. Unless that wasn't how it worked. Sora would have asked, but he resisted the urge to ask pointless questions, because that would distract from the real question of _how the heck were they going to save Riku if Xemnas killed him before Sora had a chance to save him?_

Roxas said, after a while, "When do you think we should head back?"

"Not for a while," Axel said. He took a sip of his own coffee. He made a thoughtful face, said, "I'll be right back," and went to dump more sugar and cream in it. He'd already put three packets of sugar in, and Sora was pretty sure there was more cream in there than coffee.

Roxas tried a sip of his coffee while Axel was gone, grimaced, then put it down.

"You should try some cream," Axel said, coming back. "It cuts down the bitterness. You might like coffee if you weren't always trying to drink it black."

Roxas shook his head, obviously frustrated. Quietly, he said, "How can you be so calm, when..." He didn't finish, obviously unwilling to discuss Organization matters in a coffee shop.

“We're both fine,” Axel said, reasonably. “So there's no reason to be upset.”

Roxas shook his head. “Ansem could be in charge when we get back.”

“Could be,” Axel said. “But he isn't yet. Maybe Xemnas will win. Maybe they'll kill each other off and we'll have to find new jobs, huh? No sense worrying about things yet.”

That didn't calm Sora's nerves, which meant it probably didn't calm Roxas's, either.

“If Ansem wins,” Roxas said. “He'll kill me.”

There. That was the beginning of an argument for Axel to leave the Organization. Sora hadn't expected Roxas to move this fast. He would have cheered, but he didn't want to distract Roxas. Not now.

“I won't let that happen,” Axel said. And then, hesitating for a moment, he leaned down and pressed a kiss against Roxas's mouth. Against Sora's mouth.

And suddenly Sora was back sorting out pieces of himself, in the time when he'd been shattered by Ansem's powers. He was burying things, bringing others to the surface- and there were things he didn't want to admit were even there-

Roxas pulled away. Axel looked hurt, rejected, and Roxas said, a little quietly, "We aren't alone."

Axel stood up straight and looked around at the coffee shop, at all the people who hadn't even noticed the kiss, and raised an eyebrow.

"Sora," Roxas said, as though Sora's name was an explanation.

It had been Sora's first kiss. Sora's first kiss, and he'd never even so much as wanted to kiss anyone. He'd thought, in the last few months, that he must be the latest bloomer that there ever was, or that his hormones were messed up, or something.

"You told Xemnas that Sora wasn't a problem," Axel said lightly.

"Doesn't mean he's asleep," Roxas said. "He's aware. Just- I'm in control. That hasn't changed."

"I thought Namine wiped him," Axel said. "She just reported that she did, to Xemnas. Didn't it work? Isn't he sleeping again?"

Axel looked genuinely alarmed now.

"It's fine," Roxas said. "He freaks out less this way. We talk sometimes."

Dawning comprehension. "You haven't been getting his memories wiped," Axel said. "Roxas- that's not safe."

"I'm fine," Roxas said.

Axel's look of disbelief spoke for him.

Roxas said, quietly, "If it weren't for Sora, I would be dead."

Axel did not look any less alarmed by this.

"It was Scotch," Roxas said. "He had a gun. Shot me. He would have killed me, if I hadn't let Sora have control. Sora healed me. He beat Scotch for me."

"He was saving his own skin," Axel said. "Roxas, you don't owe him anything for that."

"He said he won't kill me," Roxas said. "That he won't let anyone kill me. And- you don't know what it's like, because you don't have anyone in your head, but it's really hard to lie to each other. I think- he doesn't want to be here, but he wouldn't betray me. I'm not crazy to trust him."

Axel swallowed. "Roxas-"

"I don't want to die," Roxas said, firmly.

At that, Axel let out a shaky laugh. "Glad you haven't gone off the deep end," he said. "Good to know you're still clinging to life, at least."

"I'm clinging to _you_ , stupid," Roxas said.

Axel had that surprised look again, and Sora thought that it was the saddest thing ever, that Axel didn't know how Roxas felt about him. Sora could feel it, warm and strong. Love, mixed with desire like Sora had never felt on his own.

Kiss him, Sora said. Because Roxas wanted to, and Sora- Sora felt what Roxas did. Even if that was really weird and more than a little gay. It was too sad for them to be apart, when all that was keeping Roxas from kissing Axel was Sora.

Roxas did not kiss him. He shrunk down in the coffee shop chair, looked down. Sora said, _ARGH, ROXAS._

And then Roxas seemed to gather his courage. He looked up, and in one motion he stood, squared his shoulders, and pulled Axel down by the neck of his shirt.

The kiss was surprisingly gentle. Sora had been expecting something passionate. Something fierce, to match the feelings in Roxas's heart. But this wasn't- it was slow, sweet. It was-

-a flash of memory. Of wanting lips against his, soft. He'd wanted a kiss like this, once. He had wanted-

Sora _didn't_ want that, though. This was nice, feeling it through a veil of Roxas's emotions, but he could tell it was Roxas feeling the love-desire-want, not him.

He'd never felt anything like this. Nothing even like a shadow of this.

He didn't know what that meant.

“Thought Sora was a problem,” Axel said, a moment after the kiss ended, looking slightly stunned.

“He decided not to be,” Roxas said. “He doesn't want to be here, but I think he's on my side. Not in the Organization, but in- I don't know. Life, I guess.”

Then, in a rush, Roxas said, “Would you leave the Organization for me? Come with me, if I left? Because Ansem is going to win this fight. We both know Xemnas isn't a match for him. And I- I won't leave without you.”

Axel said, “Fuck, Roxas.”

Roxas waited.

Axel laughed shakily. “You can't just spring questions like that on a guy, Roxas.” He was quiet for a moment, then added, “You don't need me. I'm a liability. A criminal, as soon as the Organization tells anyone what I've done for them. It wouldn't be just the bad guys that we'd have to hide from. It would be the police- the divisions in charge of catching supers. Your record is cleaner. You could go to the authorities. You could be safe.”

“Don't care,” Roxas said. “I'm not going to leave you here.”

“What about Sora?” Axel asked. “He's your buddy now. Are you going to put him in danger for me?”

Roxas's face twisted into something angry. “Don't try to manipulate me into leaving you behind."

“Maybe I don’t want to go with you at all,” Axel said, tone taking on an annoyed quality. "The money is good in the Organization. I have a life here.”

“But we’re… you kissed me, and we’re friends-”

“That’s why I was trying to let you down easy. You're cute. I do like you. But you're not worth running away for."

Sora felt his nails dug into his palms. _He doesn't mean that,_ Sora said. Was Roxas really that thick?

"Fine," Roxas spat. So yes, apparently Roxas really _was_ that dumb. Sora's eyes stung a little, but Roxas held the tears back.

_He's just trying to keep you safe,_ Sora said. Hadn’t Roxas seen the look in Axel’s eyes earlier? Couldn’t he tell that Axel was just as stupidly in love as Roxas was? _Roxas, you have to fight for this!_

Roxas turned away from Axel. He took a shuddery breath as he left the coffee shop.

Axel didn't follow.

"You wanted to kill Ansem?" Roxas muttered under his breath, walking back towards headquarters. "Now's as good a time as any."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning details: Sora burns himself intentionally in order to see if his healing powers are working correctly.
> 
> Thank you to my beta british_spy. All remaining mistakes are my own.


	6. I would

Sora wasn't sure they were ready. He wasn't sure a fight with Ansem was something he or Roxas _could_ be ready for. But he had to try. Riku was depending on him.

There was a very real chance this fight would end with him dying. Right now, his healing powers weren't working as quickly as they normally did. He had to assume every other power he got from Riku wasn't going to work as well, either. Ansem would have no such problems.

He'd killed Ansem once before, but he'd had the element of surprise on his side then.

What did he have, now?

Well, Ansem might be weaker than last time. He'd been shattered into bits, and Sora knew that wasn't something you easily recovered from. Riku had been fine a few weeks ago. Ansem hadn't had long to take over, yet. This wasn't like last time. Last time, Sora had had trouble finding Riku in the twisted mass of Ansem's soul.

It was sunny out. Roxas shrugged off his hoodie and tossed it in a trash can, which earned him a weird look from an old lady slowly walking by. He ignored her.

Sora could feel the sunlight on his skin, could almost imagine that he could feel it charging up Roxas's powers.

That was the other thing he had. Roxas. Even if Sora didn't have powers on his own, Roxas did. They could work together.

In fact-

_Roxas_ , Sora said.

"Hmm?" Roxas said under his breath.

_You sure you want to do this?_ Sora asked, chickening out of what he'd meant to say.

"Mm," Roxas said, affirmatively.

_We're going to have to work together,_ Sora said. _I'm not my strongest right now._

"Yeah," Roxas said, walking faster. "I know."

Unspoken between them was the fact that they probably weren't going to make it out of this alive.

Sora had too long to think in the minutes it took to walk back to headquarters, but mostly he just had a feeling of dread. He'd never had to think before a big fight before. He'd never had time. He'd always acted on instinct, and it had always worked out.

It was no different, he told himself. He'd save Riku. Then- well, Roxas would want to run. But Sora was pretty sure Riku wouldn't hurt Roxas if Sora told him not to. Maybe they could just go back to Sora’s life. Maybe Roxas wouldn’t let him. Either way, that was about- after. There would be time to argue, if they got to that point.

And then they were back at the Organization’s headquarters..

The top half of the building was in bad shape. Chunks of the walls had been blown out. There were a couple of gawkers around, and one police officer, who was talking to Namine and looking very confused about what was happening.

No one but Namine noticed Roxas walk by. She shot him a puzzled look, but he just smiled stiffly at her and walked on in, pretending he didn’t notice her mouthing “what are you doing?” at him.

The lights were out. Roxas froze three steps in.

_You’re a walking light bulb_ , Sora pointed out. _Come on_.

Roxas shook his head. He held up one palm and a light formed above it, gently illuminating the room.

“We’re gonna have to take the stairs,” Roxas muttered. “Elevator will be out.”

It took a moment to even find the stairs, which were down a hallway and around a corner. And then it took too long to climb them. Five flights of stairs. Sora spent the whole climb wondering if Ansem was even up here. If he’d won the fight against Xemnas, why would he linger?

The last flight of stairs was destroyed, metal staircase ripped violently in half. Roxas exited the stairwell and stepped out into light.

The roof had been blown off and half the walls in the office building were gone. There was no sign of Xemnas. But Ansem stood there, facing away from Sora. His coat was a bit worse for the wear, but there was no other sign that he’d just fought for his life.

“Roxas,” he said. There was an undercurrent of anger in his voice, barely contained.

“Ansem,” Roxas replied. He took a step closer, where he was in sunshine, and breathed in. And Sora could feel his relief at being out of the dark.

Roxas was more afraid of darkness than this fight. Somehow, illogically, Sora found that reassuring.

“Why are you here?” Ansem asked.

Roxas said, “We’re all waiting for your orders. Sir.”

He was not a convincing liar. How had he ever managed to fool Riku into thinking he was Sora? Maybe it sounded more convincing when you couldn’t feel his heart pounding in your throat. Just because Roxas was less scared of this than the dark didn’t mean he wasn’t afraid now.

A few seconds passed. Roxas took a step closer again. “Sir?”

Ansem turned. “That’s not why you’re here. I’ve already told Namine what to do. If you really cared about orders, you would have asked her first.”

Roxas shrugged. “Maybe I needed to see the winner of that fight myself.”

Ansem made a noise in the back of his throat. His arm shot out and grabbed Roxas by the front of his shirt.

“Well,” he said. “Here I am. Is your curiosity satisfied, freak?” His face was too close. His breath smelled faintly of toothpaste, which would have been funny in other circumstances. Like, apparently Ansem cared about tooth decay as much as Riku did. Or- god, had he only taken over Riku’s body again this afternoon? Riku had had time to brush his teeth after lunch, and then Ansem had marched him over here.

Sora’s amusement faded instantly.

Not a speck of Roxas’s fear showed on his face. Instead, he schooled his expression into disdain.

“Yeah,” he said. “I guess.”

Ansem released Roxas’s shirt. Then he grabbed his throat and lifted him.

Roxas’s hands came up to scrabble against Ansem’s. He couldn’t do anything. He handed control to Sora, who was just as ineffective. There were spots in his vision. Crap, he couldn't die now. They hadn’t gotten in a single blow.

Luckily, Ansem released them after only a moment.

"Tell me," Ansem said. "Is your vessel still alive? Will he try to shatter my soul again?" He didn't seem afraid. He seemed more- curious. Excited.

Roxas wheezed. He said, "Sora is dead." He gave control to Sora again, who stood shakily and took a too-slow swing at Ansem. Ansem sidestepped it without much apparent effort.

"It's a pity," Ansem said. "I don't usually switch bodies so quickly, but Sora- his powers were interesting. I would have liked to play with them."

Taking control again, Roxas wrinkled his nose, "I think I actually liked Riku better than you. That takes some doing- I really don’t like him. You know he locked me in a basement in the dark?"

Ansem was not amused. He grabbed Roxas by the arm and flung him. Roxas went through shitty drywall like it was paper, though it hurt a lot more than paper.

Sora staggered to his feet again. He said, "even if Sora were alive-" and it felt really weird to talk about himself in the third person- "I can't see you making many friends. His powers would be totally useless to you." He stepped forward, took another swing. This one connected, but Ansem didn't seem to even notice it. Right. Sora's super-strength was really Riku's. If it was working, it wasn't working well.

Roxas tried his flash-in-the-face move. Ansem stepped aside, turning his head to the side and closing his eyes. He pushed Roxas against the wall, hard.

"Why are you fighting me?" Ansem said. "What possible motivation do you have? You came in here knowing you couldn't win. You're no meta. You're not even a fighter."

Roxas gritted his teeth. "Was gonna run," he admitted, when it was clear that Ansem wasn't going to let him go until he answered. "But I figured someone would come after me if I did. No one just leaves the Organization. My only chance is if there is no more Organization."

Ansem's face twisted. "You should have run," he said, after a moment. "You'd have lived longer."

Roxas laughed weakly. "You think I care how long I live? Joke's on you. I've got nothing left. No one would miss me."

" _I_ would," a voice from the doorway. As Ansem spun, his grip loosened enough that Sora was able to wriggle free.

Roxas said, " _Axel?_ " as the room burst into flames.

Sora internally cheered as Roxas made his way to Axel's side, batting flames to the side with his bare hands as he ran across the room.

_Told you_ , Sora said. He tried to radiate smugness in Roxas’s general direction, but he was overpowered by the joy- and worry- that Roxas radiated back.

“You shouldn’t have come,” Roxas said. “It’s dangerous here!”

Axel rolled his eyes and put a lot of flame between them and Ansem. “Yeah, which is why I couldn’t leave my boyfriend here to die when I realized what he was doing. I thought you were going to run!”

Roxas’s mouth hung open for a second.

“Boyfriend?” he said, after a moment.

Axel shook his head. “Stupid,” he said, but he sounded pleased.

This was totally the wrong time for this. Sora was happy for them! But they were being _so dumb_.

There was motion through the flames, and a figure jumped onto Axel. Ansem, of course, though Sora recognized the move as something Riku would do. God, no. He thought of Riku being... absorbed, and then he stopped thinking.

Roxas let Sora have control, and Sora grabbed Ansem’s shoulder and yanked. It didn’t do any good. Sora really hated not having full superstrength. He felt so useless.

Axel managed to wrestle free of Ansem’s grip- Ansem, apparently, not having practiced the grabs and counter-moves Riku and Sora had worked on for so long. And he shot flame at Ansem, burned him, ducked back. Roxas moved sideways, aimed, and fired a laser from his finger that disabled one of Ansem’s arms- at least for a minute.

And then Ansem surged forward through the flame Axel was directing at him, and kicked him in the leg. When he turned back to Roxas, he was burned badly, and grimacing, but already the blisters were shrinking. He ducked behind a wall, and Sora couldn’t tell where he’d gone. Probably he was resting for a few seconds, healing. He’d be back soon.

Roxas rushed to Axel.

Axel was on the ground. He wasn't getting up any time soon- his leg was twisted at an angle that didn’t look right.  "Run," he said. "Roxas-"

Sora could hear Ansem again. His footsteps were loud, even against the dull roar of the fire burning all around them.

"Not without you," Roxas said softly. Sora agreed. It didn't even matter what he thought about Axel, not at this point. _Roxas_ cared about Axel, and Sora cared about what Roxas thought. They weren’t going to leave him to die.

Roxas faced Ansem, and inhaled. The flames around the room all went dim and low. Sora wasn't sure Roxas even noticed. He was angry, really angry, for the first time Sora could remember. It felt scary. It felt good. Sora wasn’t sure he liked how good it felt. How clean.

Ansem said, "Ready to die?"

Roxas said, "You wish."

The flames all shot up to twice their original height, and Sora, unable to fight Ansem, stuck in the back of his own head, thought that was weird. It was like Roxas was controlling them. It didn't quite make sense, but there was no time to think about it. Because there was light all around Roxas, ribbons of it, bright enough that Ansem was squinting to see him. Roxas, for his part, barely seemed to notice.

" _You shouldn't have touched him_ ," Roxas said. And the ribbons shot out towards Ansem.

Sora couldn't see anything for a minute. He could smell just fine, though, and what he smelled was burned flesh. He wanted to heave, but he didn't.

Ansem was not standing when Roxas finished blinking away the spots in his vision, and there were... holes. Roxas looked away pretty fast, and swayed.

_He's gonna heal_ , Sora said. _Roxas, get me close enough, quick._

Roxas did the next best thing, and just gave Sora control. Sora couldn't blame him- _he_ felt drained, and he wasn't the one who'd just done... whatever that had been.

Sora kneeled next to Ansem and placed his palm on Riku's chest. He tried to focus on Riku's soul powers and not on the rapidly-closing wounds. He only had a little time.

And then- he was in.

It took a second to get his bearings. He'd seen Riku's soul as a clear blueish crystal before, with a disgusting organic tumor enveloping it. That had been Ansem. And at the end, Sora'd detached it and shattered it into a million pieces like Ansem had shattered Sora. The metaphor Sora's brain was using to communicate what a soul looked like didn't really work, because tumors weren't brittle enough to shatter. Sora'd done it anyway.

But this time-

The crystal- Riku- was much bigger. That was the first thing Sora noticed. It dwarfed the tumor this time. It had also taken on a muddy brownish hue in places, and Sora had no idea what that meant.

He reached for Ansem's soul to pinch it off, and-

-and he was thrust back into reality as Ansem punched him clear across the room. He'd run out of time.

"The hell were you doing?" Ansem said.

Sora glared. "Finishing you off," he said from where he was slumped on the ground. He wasn’t sure he could get up again. He needed a few hours of sleep and rest. He wasn’t used to nearly-human healing speeds.

Ansem was in front of Sora only seconds later. He shook his head. "A pity you don't have a soul, Roxas" he said calmly. "I would have liked your powers, too. However you got them."

Sora closed his eyes. He had nothing right now. Riku's powers couldn't save him this time, and Tidus's were useless except underwater, and he didn't have any other friends who were supers.

Except one.

_We're friends, right?_ Sora asked Roxas. He should have asked it earlier. It would have been smarter. But he’d been afraid to ask- what if the answer was no?

Roxas didn't say anything. Sora wasn't sure he was even awake.

Roxas was a good guy. Sora was sure of that. He wasn't in the Organization because he was greedy for money or power- he was there because it was all he knew, because he'd been afraid of dying at Riku or Sora's hands, because he was afraid of what would happen to his friends if he left. And  when push came to shove, he'd decided to help Sora anyway.

Roxas _was_ Sora's friend now, even if neither of them had ever expected it.

So Sora tried to think of sunshine, and how it felt on his skin.

Ansem leaned down over Sora. Then he stopped.

"The bruises on your neck- they're healing," he said, voice flat.

And- shoot, Ansem was going to figure out that Sora was still around any second now. His healing was slow but it hadn't stopped entirely.

He tried to decide if that mattered. He was dead either way.

Ansem continued leaning over, expression going weird and strained, and Sora thought, no. He thought of Roxas again. He let the feeling of trust flow through him- and shot a laser at Ansem from his finger like he'd seen Roxas do a few times.

Or, well, that was the plan. Instead, a horrible pain shot through his head. He rolled to the side- which, weirdly, Ansem let him do- and barfed.

Ansem took a step back. Sora barely noticed. He'd never hurt so badly. In a lifetime that including drowning, burning, and being shot, nothing came close to comparing except the time his soul had been shattered to pieces.

"Sora?" Ansem said, leaning over him again. Sora's last thought was, well, if he was going to be killed, at least he and Roxas wouldn't be awake to feel it. And then he passed out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One real chapter to go (which I will post within the next week- it's written but needs some editing) and then a short epilogue (currently in progress)! Thanks as usual to my beta british_spy! Any remaining mistakes are my own.


	7. Friends

Sora woke up feeling weird.

He wasn't sure how else to describe it, even to himself. Something felt wrong with his head. He didn't feel like he had a head injury- he'd had enough of those to know the feel of one. But he did feel sort of... floaty. Like, he'd never tried drugs, but when he imagined feeling high, this was what he'd thought it might feel like.

He came back to full consciousness slowly. He was warm, and that made him want to sleep more.

He thought, maybe he was dead. Maybe Ansem had killed him. That was a sobering thought, and the panic it induced was enough to wake him up the rest of the way and open his eyes.

He was lying in rubble, covered in an Organization coat. The sky was turning a violent shade of orange. In front of him, sitting against the charred, broken wall, illuminated by sunset and embers, was Ansem.

Sora sat up fast, tried to back away- but apparently Roxas had just woken up, too. There was a moment where Sora relaxed, assumed Roxas would just take control- but instead of taking control immediately, Sora could feel a moment of _switch-off_.

He thought for a second he had to be imagining it. Roxas didn't take control from Sora. He always had control, and sometimes let Sora use it. But when Sora reached for that control, like he had a million times unsuccessfully-

The end result was that Roxas tried to stand, and so did Sora, and they ended up overbalancing and falling flat on their face without either having enough control to catch themselves.

Ansem looked at them, expression blank. Sora relinquished control to Roxas, who used it to scramble to his feet- and then he stood _gaping like an idiot_.

"You didn't kill us," Roxas said, also like an idiot. He glanced around. "Where is Axel?"

"Hospital," Ansem said. "He'll be okay. I- I'm sorry." He looked sort of like he'd been crying.

Oh.

Oh.

"Sora didn't save you," Roxas said. "You were still evil when we passed out." He didn't say, _what happened?_ But it was pretty heavily implied.

Riku said, quietly, "I let him take over. And when I realized Sora was still alive, I snapped out of it again."

Sora didn't understand.

Riku said, "Tidus came back with most of a day missing, and we used his phone to track where he'd been. It wasn't accurate enough to find you, though. And Ansem... he knew where all the safe houses were. So I let him take over, so that he would lead me to you… And when I thought Sora was dead... I lost control of him. I guess I didn’t want control. I didn’t want to deal with anything. When Sora healed, though- I knew he was in there somewhere. And I got control back."

"I thought Ansem was dead," Sora said, and that's when Roxas flipped out.

"What the actual fuck," he said. "Riku- that was out loud, right?"

Riku said, "Sora?"

Roxas said, "He can't do that. He's never done that except when I let him. He can only talk in my head- and that was bad enough-"

_Take a deep breath_ , Sora advised internally.

"You're different now," Riku said.

"What?" Roxas said, glaring.

Riku cut him off. "I looked. At your soul. While you were sleeping. I didn't mess with it- I wouldn't trust me, either, right now- I just needed to see something."

"I don't have a soul," Roxas said. "Are you talking to Sora?"

Riku sighed. "I messed up big-time," he said. "Again."

Sora had a feeling he wasn't just talking about the Ansem thing.

"When I look at you," Riku said. "At anyone," he amended. "I see a garden."

Roxas was confused. Sora wasn't, though. Soul metaphors. He'd known the crystal thing wasn't what a soul really looked like. It was just the metaphor his brain had picked to make sense of it. Riku's brain had picked something else.

"You were a tree hit by lightning," Riku said. "Split all the way to the base, barely connected. I figured that just meant you were damaged, still. Healing, still. I guess. I was looking for something outside of you, an invader."

Now Sora was confused, too.

"There was no invader," Riku continued. "I think that's what screwed Ansem up, too. We were looking for the wrong thing."

Roxas said, "Then what am I?"

Riku said, "I thought Sora was acting weird, this past year, you know. He wasn't himself."

"That isn't an answer, dammit."

"I'm getting there," Riku said. "Just- there were these moments where he was quiet, or angry-"

"That was me," Roxas said.

At the same time, Riku said, "-like he used to be."

There was a pause.

"No," Roxas said.

Sora thought he might understand. He didn't want to, suddenly.

"There are things Sora always wanted to be," Riku continued. "He was quiet but he wanted to be more extroverted. He was shy but he wanted more friends. He was embarrassed of how smart he was, and tried to hide his grades... And then, suddenly- all the things he wanted to be, he was."

_No_ , Sora thought. _No, no, no._

"Everyone has a little bit of friendliness," Riku said. "A little extroversion. So my guess is, when Sora put himself back together, he only picked the parts he liked. I don't think it was conscious. I'm not sure how much consciousness Sora had, when he was in pieces"

_Sorting through things and saying, no, no, not that, I'm better than that-_

"But the thing is," Riku said, "what happened to the rest of him?"

Roxas said, "I'm not him! I'm me!"

Riku said, "No. You're half of him. A lot more than half, actually- Sora left a lot of himself behind. That tree I saw wasn't split evenly."

"No," Roxas said again. And there was that anger again. Sora thought, that had been his once? It suited Roxas better.

The ground around Roxas burst into flames, and abruptly the anger died.

"I-" he said.

"You have Axel's powers," Riku observed. "I guess that makes sense. He's your friend. I like what you've done with them. The light manipulation part of the power set. I wonder if Axel even realizes he can do that."

"They're _my_ powers," Roxas said, but he no longer sounded convinced. The flames, not very high to begin with, went out. Roxas sat on the ground again.

"What happens to me now?" Roxas asked.

"Well," Riku said, "I mean, _I'm_ not doing anything to you. Not now that I know what you are. Who you are. I know it's too late to just apologize. I've been horrible to you. I- I was so afraid for Sora that I wasn't thinking straight. But that's not an excuse. So I guess... what do you want?"

"You don't want to... to put us back together?" Roxas asked. "To fix the... the soul tree thing?"

"Do you want me to?"

Roxas handed control to Sora, who blinked at Riku. "Did I like myself?" He asked, after a moment. "Was I happy?"

Riku took a long minute to answer. "I think... no," he said. "Not really. You put on a good show most of the time, but there were moments... I wasn't in your head. I can't say for sure. But I think you kind of disliked yourself."

"I like me. Like I am now," Sora said. "And I like Roxas. He's my friend. Uh-" he looked at his feet, sheepish. "I think he's my friend, anyway. I tried to use his powers before and it didn't work. But I guess if _his_ powers are _my_ powers, that kind of makes sense?"

"We're friends," Roxas confirmed. "And I'd kind of like to keep living. As me."

Riku nodded. "Good. Because I don't have a single clue how to put you back together."

Sora looked at him. "The tree...?"

"It looks different now," Riku said. "You're not a broken tree anymore, when I look at your soul. You're two trees, wrapped around and around each other. From a distance you look like one, but up close it's pretty obvious."

Sora thought of that pain when he'd tried to connect to Roxas. It had hurt as badly as shattering, but it hadn't been a breaking sort of hurt.

"Oh," he said. "I think that's my fault." And then he shook his head. "What're we going to do about the Organization? I mean, I guess Xemnas is gone-" Riku winced- "but is someone just going to replace him?"

"I don't know," Riku said. "I can't access Ansem's memories. I don't know who the next biggest threat is. And honestly, I'm sick of fighting. I just want to go home."

"Me too," Sora said. He sighed. "I guess we'll find out when they start attacking us again."

"I need to see Axel," Roxas said. "I just- need to see for myself that he's okay."

Riku nodded. "He just had a broken leg, I think. He can probably go home by now."

Roxas said, "He doesn't have a home. He's leaving the Organization, and I'm taking him back with me."

Riku rolled his eyes. "You think Sora's mom is going to let you drag home your boyfriend?"

"I think my mom will just be glad I'm back," Sora said. "We'll sort out the rest later."

Roxas borrowed Riku's cell phone- Roxas's had not survived the fight- and texted Axel. Axel's phone had apparently been luckier, because he texted back right away. He was done with the hospital, just wrapping up paperwork. He ended his text with a heart.

Sora could tell this was going to be the sappiest relationship ever. He was kind of looking forward to watching it unfold.

They stopped by the safe house to get Sora a change of clothes- his were scorched and ruined. Riku was able to borrow a shirt but not much else. He was too tall for anything that fit Sora, and too broad for Axel's clothes.

There were no members of the Organization around anymore. Apparently the word had spread that Riku was back, and no one felt like messing with him.

They had to take the bus to the hospital. Riku had come in a car, but, he admitted, "I kind of stole it. Or, Ansem did. Let's just... leave it."

Axel was in the waiting room. He had a cast and crutches. His hair was caked in dust. Roxas ran up to him and tried to crush him in a hug anyway.

"You're coming home with me," Roxas announced. "Sora's house has a guest room, you can stay there."

Axel raised an eyebrow. "So we're all friends now? Everything is hunky-dory?"

"Yeah," Roxas said. "Riku is himself again, and I'm too tired to be mad anymore." Echoing Sora, he said, "We'll sort things out later."

Off the the side, the door to a restroom opened. Sora wouldn't have turned to look, except that he recognized the pale figure who came out.

"Namine?" Roxas said.

She smiled faintly. "Roxas."

"She came with me to the hospital in the ambulance," Axel explained. "She helped sort out all the insurance paperwork, too."

Quietly, Riku said, "Axel- no one was with you in the ambulance. I called it. I saw you leave- alone."

Namine's smile suddenly looked forced.

Roxas looked at her, confused.

"But..." Axel said, looking puzzled. "Namine called the ambulance. I remember that pretty clearly. She's been so helpful. She was even going to help me find a place to stay, and then you texted..."

Roxas's puzzled look solidified. "Hey, Namine," he said. "We're friends, right?"

"Of course," Namine said, now on more familiar ground.

It was weird, how Sora could feel Roxas reaching for power this time. And how he could feel him come up empty.

"No, we're not," Roxas said. He didn't even sound shocked. He sounded- resigned.

Namine's smile dimmed and disappeared. "Well," she said. "You'll remember that we are in a minute."

Roxas took a step back. "If you're _not_ my friend," he said, slowly. "Why did you help me hide Sora?"

Namine shook her head. "I didn't hide anything, Roxas. It's not like I actually reported to Xemnas. More of the other way around."

Roxas said, "What?"

Namine sighed. "Boys," she said. "You think the more ability you have to fight, the better suited you are to lead? No. Real power doesn't come from fighting. It comes from... connections to people. It comes from everyone being more attached to you than you are to them."

She took a step towards Roxas, one hand outstretched. Axel whacked her in the ankle with his crutch, and she stumbled. She turned to him, instead- and Sora grabbed both her hands so that she couldn't do anything to Axel- or anyone else.

They'd attracted a lot of attention. One of the nurses, a man with a wide chest, came over. "Miss, are you alright?"

Of course, Namine looked like the victim here, with Sora grabbing her arms like that. She gave the nurse a pleading look and struggled a bit. Sora wouldn't have needed superstrength to hold her, but it was reassuring to know there was no way she could break free.

"She's a super," Sora said, being careful not to make sudden moves. "I don't want to hurt her, but if she touches anyone's head she can rewrite their memories."

"He's nuts," Namine said, and- god, she was crying now. "He won't let go of me."

"No, she's a super," Axel and Riku confirmed.

The nurse looked back and forth between them. "I'm calling the cops," he said after a moment.

The police showed up a moment later, handcuffed all of them, and brought them into the local station. Sora relaxed once Namine was in handcuffs, even though she kept _crying_.

They took everyone to separate rooms to get their stories.

"You said that that girl is a super?" the officer talking to Sora and Roxas said. "Tell me what's going on."

"We're all supers," Sora said. He figured honesty was the best policy here. "Can you take the handcuffs off me, by the way? I could break them pretty easily but I figure that would be rude. Also, could you call my mom? I feel like I should probably have her here. I'm a minor."

The officer sighed. "Superstrength?"

"And healing- just myself, not other people. And light manipulation powers, I guess? Uh. And I can breathe underwater, too." He didn't mention the soul powers. Those were too hard to explain.

The officer raised an eyebrow. "Really," she said flatly.

"Well, I'm not sure about the breathing underwater part, I haven't done that in a while."

"Are you trying to tell me you're a meta, kid?"

"Yeah," Sora said. "Uh- I can prove all of those powers if you want me to. I'm not nuts, I just have a really weird life."

She still looked skeptical. "And you didn't tell anyone until now? You aren't registered?"

"There was an evil league of super-villains after me and Riku," he said. "And I thought they didn't know where we lived, so I was trying to keep it a secret? Only it turns out they were spying on me the whole time so it was kind of pointless in the end. Namine is the secret leader of the Organization, but we just found that out."

The officer rubbed her head. "Kid, I don't know-"

Sora sighed. He yanked his hands out of the handcuffs. It was pretty painful- his hands gave before the cuffs did. But he'd had way worse in the past 24 hours. The officer took about five steps back with her face turning white.

"Sorry," he said. "Look, see? Superstrength."

He showed his hands as the bones popped back into place, which made her wince. "And healing."

He handed control to Roxas. _Light show?_

Roxas summoned a soft light, let it fade, and handed control back to Sora.

"So yeah," Sora said. "I'm a meta. Riku is too. It's a long story. Axel has fire powers and Namine has memory powers- but she's evil, so don't let her use them, okay?"

"I think this is outside my jurisdiction," the officer said after a moment. "Wait here. I'm going to call... someone. God, I don't even know the procedure for this."

Sora's mom got there about half an hour later.

"Sora!" she said. She stopped short of hugging him, standing just out of reach. "Riku said- is everything okay? The problem with... Roxas?"

"I'm fine," Sora said. "We sorted it out."

And _then_ she hugged him.

Sora hadn't realized how much he'd missed her. How much he'd missed _home_ , missed normality.

"You haven't done anything wrong," she said. (That the police knew of, Sora thought unhappily.) "So we're going to get you out of here. That Namine girl tried to use her powers on an officer in the other room, so they have her locked up now. You're safe, okay? I'm taking you and Riku home."

"Axel, too," Sora said. "The redhead. He doesn't have a place to stay, mom- he tried to save my life, and he's on _crutches_ because of it-"

She rolled her eyes heavenward. "I'm going to end up with every superhero in the city staying at my house."

Sora gave her a look. "Please?" he said.

She smiled at him fondly. "Of course," she said.

There was still a lot to sort out. Sora would have to tell his mom what was going on with Roxas, and Axel, and everything. The time for that was whenever-they-weren't-in-a-police-station.

Sora had a feeling they were all going to need therapy, too. He wasn’t sure how that was going to work, with him and Roxas, but they’d figure it out.

Things were going to be okay.


	8. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for suicide (not a main character)   
> (see end notes for details)

There were a lot of loose ends to wrap up, in the next few days. A lot of people wanted to talk to Sora. (A lot of people wanted to talk to Riku, too, but he mostly hung up on them or slammed the door in their faces.)

Riku was already registered as a super, though he'd only had his original powers back then- his healing powers. No one seemed to really care about updating that listing. Mostly it was because he'd refused to reveal the extent of his powers to anyone. Sora hadn't said anything either. Axel, for his part, had clammed up and refused to talk at all without a lawyer.

Sora, though- Sora was sick of secrets. He'd keep Riku's, and Roxas's, and Axel's. But he wasn't going to have any of his own.

"I'm a meta," he confirmed to the government official again. He didn't even know the guy's name, and normally he would feel bad about that. Today, he couldn't bring himself to care. "I've known for just over a year."

He'd had to demonstrate his powers again and again over the past week.

"There hasn't been a confirmed meta power manifestation in over 200 years," the man said, pushing up his glasses and moving some papers around. Sora sighed. Was he going to have to prove himself again? But then the man continues, "Government policies have only been updated sporadically. The last time was during the cold war. According to those policies, you would be the government's secret weapon."

Roxas said, "That's not happening. I'm not a weapon. I'm not going to hurt anyone."

The man shook his head. "Of course not. Times have changed. So I suppose I should ask- what do you want?"

Sora bit his lip. "I don't know," he admitted. He was silent for a moment, to let Roxas have room to speak. It was harder to coordinate speaking when they were able to fight for control. It looked less natural.

Roxas said, "I'm sick of fighting. If I never have to hurt anyone ever again,- or get hurt, or watch other people get hurt- it'll be too soon."

"So what is your plan, then?"

Sora shook his head again. "I guess I should finish high school first," he said. "After that- I'm not sure. I guess I always assumed I'd go to college and get a job after that, you know? But that seems like a waste. I could do a lot more."

"Have you considered gaining more superpowers? That's an option for you, isn't it? Your current set is mostly oriented towards combat. Why not change that?"

"I don't think that would work," Sora said.

The man looked puzzled. "How so?"

Sora sighed. "I only get someone's power if I have a genuine emotional connection with them. If I was making that connection just to get their powers, how could it ever be genuine?"

"You can have more than one motivation at one time," the man told him.

Sora shook his head.

"Well, think about it," the man said. "We have listings of supers. We could put you in touch with people. If you want to help people, you have a lot of options for potential powers. And it doesn't hurt to try."

"I'll think about it," Sora said, mostly just to end the conversation. "I'm not rushing into anything right now, though."

"Of course."

Sora went home.

Riku was at school. He'd only missed a few days, and then he'd insisted on going back. He'd tried to convince Sora to come back, too.

"Kairi and I can tutor you," Riku said. "You don't want to graduate a year late, do you?"

But Sora hadn't seen much point in trying to finish up the year. He'd missed too much, and with everything going on it wasn't like he'd been doing well to start with. And he had a lot on his mind, right now.

"Is there anything you want to do?" Sora asked Roxas, sitting on his- their- bed.

"Lunch sounds good," Roxas said.

"I don't mean right now," Sora said. Though, yeah, he was kind of hungry. "I mean- the future."

"Dinner, then," Roxas said.

Sora made a frustrated noise. "You know what I mean."

Roxas shook his head. "I've never had a future before. You know that. I'm still not sure what to make of- of everything."

"Yeah," Sora said.

They sat in silence for a few minutes. Sora flopped down on the bed. He considered taking a nap, but decided he wasn't really tired.

"Axel wants to take classes in the fall," Roxas said. "At the community college."

"School," Sora said, with a little more disgust than he meant to inject into the word.

"I've never been to school," Roxas said. "It sounds... peaceful."

"You'd probably like it," Sora said. "I mean, apparently I used to. And you're... yeah."

It was an awkward topic. They'd kind of avoided it for the past week.

"I'm you," Roxas said. "That's what you mean, right?"

Sora shook his head. "You're not me. I'm not even sure _I'm_ me anymore. I'm half a soul- the _smaller_ half- and a lot of my memories are Namine's 'art project.' All that I really have in common with him is his powers."

Roxas said, "That's not true, you know."

Sora shrugged.

Roxas said, "If you were a different person, you'd have had to make friends with Riku all over again. I mean, I can't use Riku's powers. Genuine bonds, right?"

"Maybe that just means that _Riku_ thinks I'm the same person," Sora said.

"Maybe you're overthinking it," Roxas said.

"Maybe," Sora admitted. He sighed. "I'm not sure how Riku is handling things. He seems really quiet."

Roxas said, "Well, he did let a supervillain take over his soul for a while. Again. It's not like he's going to recover immediately from that."

"I can't believe he even found enough of Ansem in one piece to do that," Sora said. "I think Riku's soul sort of... absorbed the rest. There wasn't a lot left."

"Gross," Roxas said.

"Yeah. I don't even want to tell him that, though. I'm not sure he'd ever trust himself again if he knew bits of Ansem were inside of him."

They were both silent for another moment. They heard the door open and close, downstairs in the kitchen. A moment later, Axel came in. He leaned against the doorframe and looked at Roxas fondly.

Sora wasn't sure how to feel about Axel. Roxas liked him, and so Sora kind of had to like him by extension- though not in the same way. There was a difference between liking someone and, well, being more intimate with them. Kissing, making out, sex. Sora wasn't even sure how he felt about romance anymore, let alone any of the accompanying physical affection. That was more... Roxas.

"How's it going?" Axel asked.

Roxas sat up. "About as well as can be expected," he said, shaking his head. "Everyone wants Sora to get more powers. The government's official policy is that they want him as a weapon, but they say they're revising it."

"Sounds like a nightmare," Axel said. He sat on Sora's bed next to Roxas.

"Yeah," Roxas said. "I mean, I guess we'll see. I'm not being anyone's spy or weapon ever again. We'll hide if we have to. Run away somewhere. But I don't think it'll come to that."

"They don't know about you," Axel said. It wasn't a question.

"Of course not," Roxas said. "How could we even explain me? Besides, it's not- it's not relevant. To Sora's powers."

Axel raised an eyebrow. "You have different powers than Sora. Seems to me that's relevant."

"I don't, though," Roxas said softly.

This part should have happened days ago. Roxas had been reluctant to tell Axel about where he'd come from.

Axel waited for an explanation.

"Riku looked at us," Roxas said, after a moment. "At me and Sora. He figured me out."

"Yeah?" Axel said softly. "So what's the news? You know it doesn't matter to me, right? I'm not going to turn on you, or stop liking you."

"I'm a fragment of Sora's soul," Roxas said. "Or- I was. I guess we're both full people now. Something Sora did, during that last fight."

"Okay," Axel said. "Does that change anything?"

"It means... I'm someone different than I thought I was," Roxas said. "And- it's not just that I'm part of who he was. I'm the parts he _didn't like_. The reject pile. Sora combined all the pieces that he was happy with into a new self. And I'm the leftovers."

Sora hadn't thought about it like that. He could see how that might sting.

_I like you now,_ Sora said, not sure if that meant anything.

Axel didn't seem to know what to say. He pulled Roxas into a hug, and held him for a long while.

"Doesn't change how I feel about you," Axel said, eventually. "I could see how it might change how you feel about yourself, though. I'm- I'm shit at talking about feelings, but if you need me to, I'll try."

Roxas said, "You know why we never figured it out?"

Axel shook his head.

Roxas cupped his hands together and made a small flame in them. "I didn't realize they were your powers," he said. "I use them differently than you do." He let the flame soften into pure light, and Axel stared, transfixed.

Sora's power was his friends, and he was okay with that. It felt right to him. But, he thought, maybe Roxas was using _Sora's_ powers a little differently than Sora did, too.

_Genuine bonds_ , he thought to himself, making sure not to project the thought to Roxas. There was a bond between Axel and Roxas. It felt different than the one between Sora and Riku, though. Not stronger, or weaker. Maybe bonds were like ice cream and came in a lot of different flavors.

Axel took Roxas's hands and kissed them, which made Roxas laugh. "What are you doing?"

"You know what I like best about you?" Axel said. He didn't wait for a guess. "It's that you take the worst of me and make it look beautiful anyway."

Roxas raised an eyebrow.

"I'm serious!" Axel said. "Do you remember when I was guarding you, when we first met?"

"You talked to me," Roxas said, gaze intense. "Everyone else ignored me. I was so confused, and alone. I didn't know who I was or why I existed, and you said-"

"I said, 'Hey, Zombie, do you want half my donut,'" Axel said. "It was too awkward, you kept _staring_ at me without saying anything. I figured I'd distract you with food."

"Admit it," Roxas said. "You cared about me a little even then. That's why it felt awkward. You were worried."

"That's what I'm talking about," Axel said, smiling. He held up a hand and made a small flame. "Never thought I could do anything with my powers but burn stuff. All I ever thought to do was destroy anyone or anything that hurt me." He twisted his hand. The flame disappeared. "You'll have to show me how to do that, later. I'm not even sure what you're doing."

"Neither am I," Roxas admitted, smiling back. "We'll figure it out together."

They ended up chatting about Namine's trial for a while. Sora didn't really listen to the words of what they were saying. He had a lot to think about, still- and when Roxas was happy, that took the edge off of the worry Sora had about the future. It made him think more clearly.

* * *

For the next few days, Sora drifted. He told himself he had a lot on his mind, but really he didn't think about any of it. He just- spaced out. He could tell it worried Riku and his mom, but he just didn't have the energy to snap out of it, to put on a happy face.

And then, a few days later, maybe a week later- Sora wasn't keeping track- he was brushing his teeth after breakfast. He rinsed his mouth and looked at himself in the mirror. His reflection said to him, "Sora, do you need to talk?"

Sora shook his head. "I'm fine," he said, and he tried to turn away from the mirror.

Roxas stopped him and said, "I'm not covering for you anymore, you know."

Sora frowned. "What?"

"You're worrying me," Roxas said. "Sora, you're my friend, remember? It goes both ways. And- I can tell you're bummed out, and I've been trying to give you enough space to work through it, but you don't seem to be getting any better. And when you just let me do everything for you, it looks to other people like you're fine, so they don't say anything. But I know, and I'm not going to let you spend _another_ two weeks like this."

Sora was going to correct him, to say that it had only been a few days, but realized he wasn't even sure.

Roxas said, "I think we need to talk to someone. A therapist or someone."

Sora let out a puff of air. He turned from the mirror, and Roxas let him. "They'd think we were nuts," he said.

"We'll find someone who specializes in supers," Roxas said. "Powers can go weird. I'm sure we're not the only strange case out there."

"You'd have to admit you exist," Sora said. "I'm not going to get a therapist and then lie to them about something like that."

"I'll do it," Roxas said, without any hesitation.

Sora thought for a moment. "Okay," he said, finally.

"Good," Roxas said. "We're setting up an appointment today. Right now."

"We can't right now. I have to go to meet with... that guy. The government guy."

"I was thinking we should ask him for a recommendation, actually," Roxas said. "He's the super liaison for the whole island- he's gotta know someone. Or, you know. He can point us in the right direction."

"Are you gonna tell _him_ you exist?" Sora asked.

"You want me to?" Roxas asked.

Sora said, "I hate secrets. They make me feel... disconnected."

"Okay," Roxas said. "Then we'll do it." His voice came out very certain, but Sora could feel that he wasn't.

"It's your choice," Sora said. "Don't do it just because of me. It's your life, too."

"Isn't going to be much of a life if I keep myself a secret," Roxas pointed out. "But- promise me something?"

"Sure," Sora said. "What?"

"Meet some people with useful powers," Roxas said. "Try to make friends with them."

"Huh?"

"You're the social one," Roxas said. "You made yourself the social one. So use it."

"I didn't do it purposefully," Sora said.

"Make it purposeful _now_ ," Roxas said. He made a frustrated noise in the back of their throat. "That came out weird. Just- if we want to be happy, we can't tiptoe around this forever. We're not the same person anymore, and that- that can be good, right? We have to _make_ it good." He took a breath. "And also- if we don't want to end up as some secret government weapon, we should get powers that make us more useful doing other things. As soon as possible."

Sora hadn't thought about any of that. He wasn't really ready to dig into most of it. But that last part-

"I don't know if I can do it," he said. "I don't know if I can make friends with someone just for their powers."

"I don't think that you can, either," Roxas said.

Sora said, "What?"

"I think it'll start out awkward for about ten minutes," Roxas said, "and then you'll forget all about their powers and get to know them better, and before the day is out you'll genuinely care about them."

"I don't know," Sora said.

"You became friends with me," Roxas said.

Sora wanted to protest. But he remembered that first day, when he would have let Riku kill Roxas, would have allowed that to save his own skin- and he thought of how he felt now. Roxas was important to him, and it had happened while they'd been actively trying _not_ to make friends with each other.

"Okay," he said. "I'll try."

Roxas glanced at the clock. "Shit. Weren't we supposed to be there by now?"

* * *

Roxas was right. Sora met Aerith a week later, and was learning the intricacies of her healing powers less than a week after _that_.

Sora and Roxas went to therapy. They had a birthday. They went to Riku and Kairi's graduations with Sora's mom and Axel. Riku wasn't going far- just to the local college where Axel was starting in the fall. Kairi was going a little further, but she'd be back for break.

* * *

Namine's trial took longer. It took months to get her to court, and while a couple members of the Organization had come forward to testify against her, it was still a bit of a gamble.

Sora hadn't wanted to be a witness. He hadn't wanted to be involved at all. But if Namine was ever free again, she could start the whole Organization again, with any supers she found. Most people could be corrupted if their brains were messed with.

They won, in the end. Namine would be in prison for the rest of her life.

As she was walking away, covered from the neck down in dense fabric so that she couldn't touch anyone and handcuffed to boot, Sora thought it was a huge waste. He didn't understand her at all.

She turned her head towards Sora, then, and gave him a look that was so terribly sad that he wasn't sure how to feel. And then her eyes rolled back in her head and she collapsed.

Sora stood up before he realized what he was doing. Roxas stopped him from moving any closer.

She was rushed to the hospital under strict security, and it was days before Sora heard anything more about her.

"She wiped her own memories," Riku told Sora, later. "They told the reporters before they told us." He shoved his laptop into Sora's lap, but Sora and Roxas didn't read the article that was pulled up.

"What?" Sora asked.

"She's a vegetable," Riku said. He looked like he didn't know what to feel about that.

Sora did. "That's horrible," he said.

They were quiet for a while.

Roxas said, "You know what stuck with me? Of everything she ever said, I think the only honest thing was at the end."

“Yeah? I don’t even remember what she said. She was kind of raving.”

“She said power doesn’t come from hitting people. It comes from relationships with them.”

Riku scoffed. “I’m pretty sure she didn’t say anything that coherent.”

“She twisted it,” Roxas admitted.

There was another silence.

“I wish I’d understood her,” Roxas said. “I thought for a while that we were friends.”

And that was that.

* * *

Sometimes, Sora connected to people just to connect to them. He’d never done it before, but these days it was reassuring, to know that they were alive and well.

So as he was falling asleep, he thought of Riku, and felt strong. And he thought of Kairi, even though she didn’t have powers, and he could feel a sort of warmth at the other end of that connection even if nothing came through.

He connected to his mom. Again, she didn’t have powers- but there was a kind of bond there, and he could feel it.

It turned out he and Tidus were still friends, too. And he’d been making new friends, too, so he thought about them.

He saved Roxas for last, every night. It didn’t hurt to connect to him, these days. Sora still wasn’t sure what had been up with that first connection- why it had split them like that, fixed them and broken them in two all at once.

“I can feel when you do that, you know,” Roxas said sleepily. “Are you afraid I’m gonna disappear on you?”

“I’m just glad you’re there,” Sora said, already drifting off.

“Me, too,” Roxas said.

Everything was alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning details: Namine erases her own memories as a form of suicide. This is not graphically described.
> 
> Thank you for sticking with me through this fic! I hope you enjoyed it :)

**Author's Note:**

> As noted in the beginning notes, despite being a "sequel" of sorts, this is meant to stand on its own. If it is intolerably confusing, please let me know so I can improve it. Thank you!


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